Ramblings of the depraved.....
 
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Let the back stabbing begin!!
Posted:Aug 25, 2016 4:40 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 6:13 am
5517 Views

Sigh.....

For such a small store, there is a huge amount of drama that happens within those four walls.

What I wouldn't give to be independently wealthy.

As the designated nice guy, I'm stuck listening to EVERY single comment, complaint, and gripe my coworkers have.

Kinda sucks!
0 Comments
Ex Husband, Ex Friends?
Posted:Aug 24, 2016 4:41 pm
Last Updated:Aug 24, 2016 7:33 pm
6613 Views

Why are things always awkward when you see a friend of an ex?

Standing there, forced smiles, looking in every direction but at the other person, waiting for someone to break the ice and make the first comment.

In my case, it's usually the other person. I was always painfully shy anyway, even without the drama.

"How are you doing [secret_lade]?"

"I'm good! I'm good! How are you doing?!" Forced cheerfulness.

"Oh, I'm doing pretty good too!" Eyes wide, wide fake smile.

Complete silence..... Cicadas are buzzing off in the distance.

"Well, it was great catching up with you! Until we meet again...." dramatic hand gesture. Why am I making this into a joke?? I want to crawl into a hole and die.

"It was good seeing you, too, [secret_lade]. You look good." They always sound surprised when they say that. I know my ex husband has not said one kind word about me in the 4 years since we've been divorced, I can only imagine what people think.

It has taken me a long time to get back on my feet again, I left my marriage with virtually nothing. God knows my ex husband made NOTHING easy on me so I can't help but feel triumphant whenever I think about how badly he wanted me to fail and the fact that I came out on top anyway.

The best revenge is living well.
3 Comments
Here's to 'hopefully' getting a good nights sleep.
Posted:Aug 23, 2016 4:51 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 8:02 am
7835 Views

I did a little 20 minute beginner's yoga thing tonight.

TOTALLY kicked my ass.

I'm really, very embarrassed by this, I actually broke a sweat. My arms are going to be sore in the morning.....

Is this normal?

Yoga is one of those things that I'd always thought about doing, and mentioned several times I'd like to try it, but never did.

Followed the yoga with a nice, hot shower, using my black chamomile aroma therapy shower gel, then followed that with the black chamomile lotion before I got dressed.

Keep your fingers crossed that I can actually sleep tonight.

Last night was pathetic. Fell asleep at midnight, woke up at 3am, stayed up until 5am, slept until 6am, and have been up ever since. The bags under my eyes have bags of their own.

Wish me luck!
3 Comments
Everything else is just... Meatloaf.
Posted:Aug 22, 2016 7:40 pm
Last Updated:Sep 2, 2016 6:14 am
6261 Views

Meatloaf.

A hodge-podge of meat and vegetables mixed together in a bowl and baked until brown.

One of my specialties!

"Yum, this meatloaf is good, Mom," my said, crunching away across the table from me.

Yes, I did say crunching.

Chuckling to myself, time had gotten away from me and I managed to overcook it to the point it became a little crunchy in spots.

"Thanks, babe," I smiled back.

It's those treasured comments that seem to come when I least expect them that make my day.
3 Comments
Generalized Anxiety Disorder
Posted:Aug 22, 2016 12:09 am
Last Updated:Aug 22, 2016 8:09 pm
6145 Views

It keeps me up at night, I fall asleep, but never for very long.

It doesn't allow my mind to shut off. I focus on small incidents that I feel didn't go as planned and replay the scenario in my mind over and over again.

It isolates me. I feel like everyone is judging me, mostly because I am always judging myself.

On my bad days, I have difficulty making even the smallest of decisions without an immeasurable amount of stress.

It is exhausting. Overthinking every decision, every conversation, every action, every minute of the day.

And, I deal with this every day.

Most of the people who know me don't know I have these struggles. I do a great job of pretending. Having worked in management positions most of my adult life, I've gotten pretty good at faking confidence when I sometimes feel inferior. I stand behind knowledge and use it as a shield when I have to face a situation that causes me anxiety.

Knowledge is something that makes me feel secure.

Today was a high anxiety day for me, I'm not really certain why. It doesn't always have a trigger, sometimes it just is. When I got home from work, I yelled at my because the apartment was a wreck, and spent the next hour cleaning that up, even though my feet hurt and I was starving.

Now I can't sleep, and I keep replaying that scene over and over in my mind, feeling absolutely terrible about it.

My rational mind knows I shouldn't. They've long since forgotten I was mad when I first got home and it's not like I made them help me. My continued to game with his friends on his Xbox and my and I watched tv together on the couch until bed time.

I just can't turn it off.
1 comment
Honesty
Posted:Aug 21, 2016 1:41 am
Last Updated:Jul 10, 2020 3:01 pm
7346 Views

Honesty is the best policy.

Honest hearts produce honest actions.

Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom.

Honesty is an expensive gift. Do not expect it from cheap people.

We've all heard the cliche one-liners, these are just a few that have somehow managed to remain lodged in my memory. What they don't convey is, how hard being honest can really be.

Honesty is painful.

Honesty can be brutal.

Honesty can break your heart.

I broke a man's heart today. It is just as painful for me, as it is for him, I can assure you. I was honest with him about my feelings of unhappiness, I told him I couldn't go back to things the way they were.

And, I can't.

When you are unhappy resentment begins to grow inside you, consume you, takes over. Life is too short for unhappiness and resentment.

I've already traveled that road once.
3 Comments
LIQUID STEELE
Posted:Aug 19, 2016 4:36 pm
Last Updated:Aug 20, 2016 5:01 am
6292 Views

DRINK BEFORE SEX

[image of woman's ass here]

Does anyone else chuckle a little at the ads pictured on this site? I can't help but marvel over how things have changed over the years. When I first signed up, back in the stone ages, there were no blogs, no ads, people didn't have to email each other a specific number of times before you could exchange information.

It was pretty archaic, really.

The addition of the blog feature has been really nice, I'll admit. It's the blog that draws me back, the small circle of friends who rally around each other through rough times and rejoice in good times.

A place to reveal those secrets you can't reveal in real life.

This is my third time around, here. New phase in life, new profile, new wants, new needs...... Blah blah blah....

There is one underlying factor that remains the same, however. That need for physical human touch. I'm noticing something different this time around, though.

I'm different.

A lot of the men on here are looking for an easy piece of ass that they can hook up with from time to time. I have nothing against that at all, or them for that matter. They are being honest, they have needs that need to be met and that is, to an extent, why a site like this exists.

I'm finding... I just can't be that 'easy piece of ass'. I want more. Someone who can hold a conversation, correctly spell the word divorce, send an introduction email that contains words instead of dick pic's.

I know these men are on here, I've met them before. They are few and far between, but I can hold out until I find the right one.

Just because I'm not looking for Prince Charming to scoop me up and ride off into the sunset with me it doesn't mean I have to be the who is hanging out under the bridge with the trolls.
2 Comments
Is it just me?
Posted:Aug 18, 2016 8:41 pm
Last Updated:Aug 19, 2016 4:06 pm
6316 Views

Or, does the hair net on the bald guy seem a little..... Unnecessary??

My and I ate out last night and the guy who delivered a portion of our meal was completely bald, yet wearing a hair net.

Overkill? Um, I'm thinking yes.

Even my asked me why someone who doesn't have hair had to wear a hair net.

She's 8 years old.
4 Comments
It's National I Love My Feet Day!
Posted:Aug 17, 2016 5:53 pm
Last Updated:Aug 18, 2016 8:42 pm
6696 Views
What better way to celebrate than with a couple of photos!





In other news.....

It was a completely shitty day at work today.

My coworker who cried on my shoulder last week because she was so poor she had to take her to the food pantry to get groceries was in the store today.

SHOPPING!!

I would like to add, this was the SECOND time this week she was in shopping.

Poor, huh.... Food Pantry, huh.....

I feel a little disgusted when I see her. From the day she started it's all been a huge pity party for her. Something is ALWAYS going on. If it's not her imagined health scares it's her finances. When it's not her finances she isn't getting along well with our other coworkers and crying because they are 'mean' to her.

If I hear her talk about buying underwear at a yard sale one more time I'm going to scream. Maybe if she hadn't spent $700 on 'greens' and vitamins 3 weeks ago she could afford a new pair of fucking underwear.
1 comment
Thank God for small miracles!
Posted:Aug 16, 2016 2:47 pm
Last Updated:Aug 17, 2016 2:29 am
4383 Views

Air conditioning that works!

Spanx!!

$20 found in a pocket!

Caffeine!

old enough to do chores!

Silence!

Shows to binge watch on Netflix!

Genuine appreciation!

Leggings!
0 Comments
Lake Michigan Perfection
Posted:Aug 15, 2016 6:47 pm
Last Updated:Aug 16, 2016 4:49 pm
6896 Views

I spent the afternoon at Sturgeon Bay.

So beautiful....

The water was as calm as I've ever seen Lake Michigan, and warm. I literally spent 2 hours playing and lounging in the water.

Depressing to think summer is beginning to wind down and school will be starting soon.

Ugh.....

Afterward we stopped at DQ for a bite to eat. Saw my reflection in a window and nearly died.

Totally flashing way to much cleavage.

I wasn't really planning on stopping anywhere after swimming, so I had only thrown on a pair of cut off jean shorts and a light open front sweater to wear over my bathing suit. The problem was, bathing suit conceals nothing in the cleavage area.

Yep, I'm pretty sure I was looking fairly trampy.

Oh well, this was probably my last trip up this year, I'm sure the good folks of Mackinaw will have forgotten me by next year.
2 Comments
Would you rather.....
Posted:Aug 15, 2016 7:20 am
Last Updated:Aug 31, 2016 12:19 am
5322 Views

Be with an attractive woman who is a little overweight?

Or....

Be with a homely woman sporting a rocking body?

All honesty is much appreciated. As someone who has been battling body image issues, I would love to get some outside perspective on the subject. Personally, I prefer a handsome guy with a little meat on his bones. Yum!
It doesn't matter, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Definitely beauty, weight is variable.
Rocking body! I'm not interested in the face anyway!
1 comment , 8 votes
Observations I Made Today
Posted:Aug 14, 2016 5:59 pm
Last Updated:Aug 16, 2016 11:29 am
6853 Views

1. Believe it or not, I never noticed until TODAY that it was Huey Lewis in the gymnasium who turns down Marty McFly when he auditions in Back to the Future.

2. Even though it's 3 times as expensive, clinical strength deodorant ISN'T any better than regular strength.

3. will do ANY chore to get their electronics privileges back.

4. Former coworkers who have NOT improved their life situations since you last saw them will go out of their way to avoid you in public situations.

5. I go out of my way to approach people who go out of their way to avoid me. I want to know the juicy details of their misery.

6. Without realizing it, I picked a side in regards to the work place feud.

7. I only wear dangly earrings.

8. The hotter and muggier it is, the bitchier I get. Even though I say summer is my favorite season, I'm lying. I actually love fall.

9. Salt and pepper hair on men turns me on.

10. Even though I went grocery shopping yesterday, I had nothing to make a complete meal tonight for dinner. I MUST utilize a grocery list!!
3 Comments

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