Can a bad person, turn out to be good? Can a person redeem themselves? Maybe, I had a uncle who was a son of a bitch. He was abusive to my aunt, wasn't a good father. On some payday he would gamble his check and lose all his money , and my aunt wouldn't see him for several day. My aunt had to pay all the bills. My aunt must have really loved this man! She had four kids with him, and never filed for divorce. She was his rock when he was down and out, she always took him back when he left, and when he was sick she nursed him back to health. There was one time he admitted that he didn't deserve such a loving woman. Years later she died, and he inherited everything she owned, two cars, a little money and a house, along with the life insurance policy. Family members was upset, and thought he shouldn't have gotten anything. Later in years, my dad died. He was a good man, good father and everyone loved him. He was 6yrs younger than my uncle. I was upset, why would God take a good man and let a horrible man remain alive? I look at life as unfair, I was hurt. But as time passed by, my uncle started to change. He gave up drinking, cussing, and started to go to church once in a while. His child, my cousin moved in with him. He tried to reach out to the other children, but my oldest cousin refused to acknowledge him. His health start to deteriorate, so my cousin was there to take care of her dad. At times, I talked to other family members and they said he did 180 degree turned. I couldn't believe it, with in a year he died. Then I thought about it, my dad was a good man, and did all he had to do so god took him, and my uncle was spared and given a chance to redeem himself. It took much longer for my uncle, compared to my dad. So the question is? Can we be redeem? Maybe if we live long enough, we can!
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"Life simple pleasures"
Posted:Apr 18, 2014 6:37 pm
Last Updated:Apr 20, 2014 8:59 am

So what drives you, motivate you, get you going. Is it money, fame, wealth? What your biggest desire. We all have that something that keep us going another day. There are many pleasures, it could be, just to be the best, or getting in a position that life is not stressful. Maybe It could be writing blogs on Heated Affairs. There was a time when I was down and depressed. I thought I had no pleasures, So as I was thinking, I thought I needed something to keep me going another day. A purpose in life, then one day, it came to me, it was simple. My life pleasures is Laughter. I love to laugh and make my friends laugh. The reason for the air that I breathe is for my laughter. My life pleasure, while also being simple, it don't cost a thing, and it's the best way to cause happiness. What's your pleasure?
1 comment

Posted:Apr 18, 2014 2:49 pm
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2014 8:18 pm

Are we who we are, from our surrounding? Imagine there are two babies, one born to rich parents and one born to poor parents. Will the baby born from the rich parents be more of a success that the poor ? In 1983, there was a movie called "Trading places" with Dan Aykroyd and Eddie Murphy. It was a comedy, but it was deep. Aykroyd was a snobbish rich man, Murphy was a poor man that pretend to be cripple to get money. There was two old guy in the movie, they had a bet. If you chance the two men environment they would be come different people. The rich man would commit crimes and the poor man would be a model citizen. They ruin the rich man, ruin his business and frame him for having drugs, he lost everything. The poor man was taking off the street and put in the rich man position, and everything you could imagine. Can't tell the rest, you got to see for yourself. So is there a method to the madness? Is How we do in life, is because of environment or how we was raised? I can't answer that, I never been rich, we went from poor to lower middle class. I do admit. we as a family did better as things got better, I, myself did better in life. I wanted more in life, and had the desire to achieve some of my goals. But, I can't say that in every case. I had friends from both side of the tracks. My friends who parents who was financially secure, end up not doing as well as my friends from the other side of the tracks, who would have thought that. I'm amazed about that, I really thought my one friend would doing a lot better. But what It come down to it, it's not the Environment, What? It's not the environment, or not even how we was raised. It come down to 'US" as an individual. My one friend from upper society, got with some bad people, got hooked drugs and spend most of his life in jail, he get out a fail his drug test and right back in, I feel for my friend, I can just hope for the best. My other friend, was around the drugs and alcohol growing up, he's not a drug user, he's a person who has a 9 to 5, like me and surviving. To be honest, I though he would be the one on drugs and spend most of his life in jail. Go figure! But, there are some of us who's a product of their environment. It wasn't a surprise that young girls in my neighborhood, going to have tons of . We know a family, the mom had 9 , so the was sexual active at 13 and she had 9 , starting from the age of 13, from seven different daddies. I had a good friend who hate his dad for leaving his mom, he said, his dad was a womanizer, he's the same way too. If you tell him different, he would be ready to fight you. So are we our Environment? It's not for me to say, It's up to you!
"Are you a good listener'?
Posted:Apr 14, 2014 8:21 am
Last Updated:Apr 14, 2014 2:57 pm

Are you a good listener? To be honest, maybe at times I'm not. I have been given advice at times, but desperate matters has to happen for me to take that advice. Also, if I absolute believe that I'm right, I might not listen either. There a lady I know, she get mad with me and she say, you don't respect me and never take my advice! One thing about me, if a person is critical, I wont listen. I can be wrong as two left shoes, but I don't take advice from a critical person. I also don't take advice or listen to someone telling me something that wrong, I might be a fool, but I'm not foolish, come to think about it, I'm both! Well, anyway, there are some people who are excellent talker and if you listen to them, they will bleed you dry. Remember in Africa people listened to Jim Jones and thousands of people committed suicide. That prove you don't listen to idiots or madmen, or listen to a mad idiot, that not good. I have a theory, would you like to hear it? A wise man only get wiser if he listens. So, my question is? Are you a good listener? Only if the person giving the advice is wise.
1 comment
Posted:Apr 13, 2014 1:25 pm
Last Updated:Apr 14, 2014 5:41 am

When we look in the mirror, do we like what we see? I known a woman who was 40lbs over weight, she hated what she saw when she look in the mirror, but I saw a kind, sweet, beautiful person. When I looking in the mirror, I see a guy who kind of let himself go. I'm not in the best shape right now, I don't play basketball or sports like I used to, I haven't ran in a few years. I'm getting older so my hairline isn't the same. But, I love what I see, I still see a good person, great friend, and an excellent lover, and if you my true friend, I got your back. Do you hate the person we see? What's our perception? We might feel we can chance ourselves, but try this, chance that person that look back at you, when you look in the mirror! First thing you do, is not only like them, but love them. They might have done someone or something wrong, forgive them! They deserve a second chance. Remember everywhere you go they go too. Look after them, because what you do reflects them. Go for a walk, it would clear both of your minds, and it's relaxing. Start trying to eat right, if you both overweight, help them lose weight. Maybe cut back on the sweets for starter and eat fruits and nuts for a snack. Every day walk or exercise for 15min, that not hard we get 24hrs to a day, 15min can be done. After a month try 20min and so on. If that person, lack conversation, read to them or maybe watch something informative, that will help them when they talk to others. Remember this person is your project, they need you to become a better them! You tell that person you love them, not in a conceited way, but you tell him, chance your though about them. if that person is a know it all, or a smart ass, you stop them from being that. You create them into a likable person. This is going to be a work in progress, but in the end you going to look in the mirror, and see the person looking back at you, and you going to love their "PERCEPTION"!
"Green lights all the way'
Posted:Apr 10, 2014 7:12 pm
Last Updated:Apr 12, 2014 3:48 pm

Imagine you have one of them days that everything goes your way. Get up and you have a good feeling things will fall in place. You normally leave and catch every red light possible. But today is different, nothing but green lights, green light all the way! I never when to any destination would out getting at least one red light, so If I get all green, it would be sign. I would know my luck has changed. I would buy a lottery ticket, I would just need one, because I would have the winning numbers. Go to the casino and play my favorite machine and bet the max, so I can win tons more money. I'm superstitious, no different than a person carry a rabbit's foot or a four leaf clover. Or someone doing a ritual before their favorite sports team play. We might be considered foolish or even consider fools. I usually don't win. But I look at life, one thing I can say I'm lucky. I'm bless, as many times I try to mess up my life, I'm still standing. We all need luck, but realistically, I probably won't win the lottery, might have to work till I'm 65 and put money in my 401K, that Ok. Once in a while I can take a trip and I do enjoy life when I can. But I won't give up on my superstition, this is one thing that give us hope that maybe things might get lots better, and by chance, if it really do happens? "Green lights all the way'!
1 comment
Posted:Apr 10, 2014 4:38 pm
Last Updated:Apr 20, 2014 2:59 pm

Do you like chocolate? Want some? There are some women who love black men, but some who won't touch a black man with a ten foot pole, well, they won't touch this black man. I love all flavors, chocolate, caramel, vanilla, cherry, lemon, I think women are a beautiful creation. Big or small, short or tall, we love you! I work with a white women had kind of a hippie, she had black friends hung out with blacks, but she said, she would never be intimate with a black man or this word that she used, "Interbreed" with a black man. That Ok, I'm not asking her to have my baby. I know some Asians women who only mess with successful white men. Everybody like what they like. I want everyone to know, I'm not a player by no mean, believe or not I'm a good guy. I tested the waters at age 11 and got hooked. I think sex is the best gift a man and a woman can give each other. So ladies, in the want to try black, remember what they say. Once you go black, you won't go back. Who knows? But check this out, you wake in the morning and have a black man on your mind, whether it's a famous actor or a friend, you find yourself listen to our type of music, and you find yourself talking a lot of slang. You might be craving some "JUNGLE LOVE"
"What show confidences in a person?
Posted:Apr 7, 2014 6:02 pm
Last Updated:May 1, 2014 2:44 am

Is it ok to have too much confidences? Some might consider that to be cocky or conceited. One thing I know, people who are confident are go- getter and a success in life. One think I admit, I lack confidence, there are time I felt like an underachiever. I met a lady on a date site years ago. At the time, my wages was low, I live in an apartment in a bad part of town and my transmission going bad on my car. She lived in an area, a few miles from where live now, and in that area, people have money. I went to her home, she was a knockout, had a home that you see in a magazine, educated, and financial secure. I had nothing. We went out and had a blast! She call to make sure I made it home safely, and wanted to see me again. I let it end, because I felt I was going to be exposed. I felted I wasn't in her league, not good enough for her. I look back and she was everything I wanted, but I lack confidence and my self-esteem was low. I talk to my doctor about her, he told me she wouldn't had cared what I had, or what I haven't, she was into me. I could believe it So confidence, where can I buy some? You can't buy it, It's just how we perceive ourselves. First we got to love ourselves , that step one and If we do, we won't let us fall. But, I know sometimes we don't try to do things because we know we going to fail, but failing is a good thing! If you try whether we do good or failed, we made an attempt. We all going to fail at something, but some of us going to fail at almost everything, that alright, life has it lessons. But, I respect the person who afraid to do something, but do it, rather that the over confident person. The over confident person, love to brag about everything, and need that pat on the back, they would step on you to get ahead. They want to be notice, and acknowledge for everything that they do. They want all the credit for the work, even though it might be a group thing. They are selfish, loud mouth and got to be heard. I respect the underachieve more. But there are ultimate confident people, they are ones who do their best, and their work speaks for itself, they are honest and legit, they are willing to help you be a success, they don't ask for praise. They earn their way to the top by merit, schooling, and doing good work, they don't kiss ass, and they are down to earth! What show confidences is a person? " IS BEING HUMBLE"!!!!!!!
Honest is the best policy...or is it?
Posted:Apr 6, 2014 8:42 am
Last Updated:Oct 15, 2014 4:25 am

Years ago I worked at a place, there was a trucker that came from Texas to drop off his load. He back up the truck and someone unload the truck. He always seem happy, but I could tell he's putting on an act, and he reek of booze. One night I was off my shift, and he drove up. I ask him, was everything OK? He always say yes. But I ask him to tell me the truth. He said, you got time. I told him, I'm off shift and have plenty of time. So we when in the break room, and have a cup of coffee. He started saying , he worked for this company since he was 18 years old. He asked his high school sweetheart to marry him and she say Yes. Their goal was to have three . They set a date for the wedding, and a week before he got married his buddies gave him a bachelor party. He said, he got a little tipsy that night a slept with one of the strippers. He told his buddies that he need to tell his wife to be about what happen. His buddies said, forget about it, don't tell her and go on with his life! So he and his wife to be got married. At this time he said, I was the happiest man alive, a great wife, a good job, two and a great home. By this time ten years passed. his wife was pregnant with their third . They always wanted to have three . He said, his conscience was still bothering him after all these years. He said, when he come home from road trip he was going to tell her what happened years ago. He told his wife what happen at the bachelor party ten years ago. He said, I was tipsy and I woke in the morning, and a stripper and I was in bed naked. He said, he never slept with anyone else, and his conscience been bothering him every since. He said, she stood there for a moment and gave him a stare. She said, I love you, you my husband , we going to work it out and I forgive you. He said, how bless he was for getting a second chance. So 20yrs later, he was preparing to retire. When they was in high school they talk about him getting a job and retire in 30yrs, by then the would be gone and they can travel and enjoy life. They were debt free, the house was paid and they had no bills at all, they both had nice cars. He told her, he was going to put in his paper for retirement, she said, that not a good idea, he said, why? She said, she wanted a divorce. he said, what happen, what did I do. He said, he forgot about the bachelor party, She said, you know why! You cheated on me before we got married. He told her, 20yrs ago, I told you what happened, you said you loved me and we were going to work things out! if you felted that way, why didn't you divorce me 20yrs ago. She said, I always wanted three and I wanted then with you. I wanted us to be a family and see them go to college and go on with their lives. You were a great father, excellent husband, but I can't forgive you for what happened. She said, we going to sell the house, anything in it you want you can have. Once the house is sold, I'm leaving the state and you will never see me again! She moved out, took her things and file for a divorce. So within a few months the house was empty and eventually the house sold. They had someone to do the paper for their money on the house, she got her share and he got his. He said, crying, please don't leave me we dated since we were in the 5th grade and you always been a part of my life, don't go! She said, it's over! He said, she kissed him for the last time and said, have a nice life! He said, I been now working for the company for 40yrs, still miss her, and never got re-married. I see the once in a while. I ask about their mom, they said the promise her that they wouldn't tell her where she at. After they were divorce two years, he heard that she got re-married. He said, he been unhappy since. In this world we taught to do the right thing no matter what is it. So my question is.....Honesty is the policy...or is it?

I have a question. If a person mess around before they are married, is that still adultery?

Posted:Mar 29, 2014 8:22 am
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2014 10:44 am

What is it that defines you? Your love, your desire and what make you stand above everyone else? What is the one thing we good at? The thing we always wanted to do and most of us spend our whole life to achieve that goal. My passion in life was to be a dental assistant, she went to school for it, got into the field and hated it. She now work at a bank doing mortgage loans and happy. Wow, that a 180% different. There are many who think their passion is one thing and it might be another thing, who knows? Our world was created by someone passion. If you look at the pyramids, the slaves who created them did an amazing job! They had ho ladder, hammer, nails, no modern tools that we have today, and it's one of the most beautiful creation we have in his world, kind of like a gift from up above. In 105AD Cai Lun invented paper, at one thing we wrote on stones, and money was only made of coins. Henry Ford had a vision for a faster way to get around, we got around by back or and buggy and trains. He invented the fist automobile, taking about having a good idea. In 1799 George Cayles, designed the first flight. A glider to can carry a man aloft, but him doing this, it gave the Wright brother the idea about the first airplane. Because of one man's passion another man or woman get their passion. For instance, Alexander Graham Bell, invented the first telephone, and someone use that idea and came up. with something else. In the 40s there a comic character called "Dick Tracy" he could talk to his boss and see him by his watch phone. Guess what! That technology exits today! Believe it or not! From some comic strip 70 years ago. But Bell having his invention, it inspired someone to have a idea for another invention, the first cell idea came from "Dick Tracy" comic. We all have passions, maybe it's any ideas from some else's idea or maybe it's original, I don't know? Only you know what your passion, you might be surprised, what you do would have and effect on everyone and everything else in the world? Imagine that? Like they say, "Great minds think a like". In life is you find someone who unsure what they want to do it life. You just say there three words to them. "WHAT'S YOUR PASSION"????

Posted:Mar 27, 2014 7:13 pm
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2014 1:16 pm

We all have choices in our lives. What we choose, may have consequences. A while back I made a choice and I choose to take my gas, food, and entertainment money for the pay period and go to the casino. I figured that I would quadruple my money. WRONG! I lost everything but the draws off my ass. I had to borrow money for gas, and lucky for me I had some food in the house. I couldn't get mad because it was my choice. Probably a good thing, if I would had won. I would have eventually lost it, so but not winning, I hardly go at all now. I knew of a young person, a young , during my years, that choose to hang with some bad people, they did some bad things, but by him being there with them he had a check mark against him. The same team, was really a good , but he was poor and broke and he lived in a bad environment. The young man made a choice to steal a few things, he got caught, the man who owner the store was so upset with people stealing from him, so he press charges against the . It was under $5 for the items he stole, his parents paid the store owner and the team got another check mark against him. Years passed the got excellent grades in school and excel, he became a great young man, he was being around a different crowd of people, he made honor roll. When It was time for him to graduate, his parents a school try to find a way for him to get a scholarship. Well, he didn't, so sad. His choices in the pass mess up his future. Wow! No scholarship. Not sure if we ever went to college, this was a long time ago. Another story, when I was in the military, I had a friend, who him and his lady was tied at the hip. They were a great item. He loved her and was good to her , she was 5 yrs older, but he didn't care. There was another guy in the military that always had a crush on her, he knew it and couldn't stand that guy. My friend, had a girlfriend back at home, he was from Maryland. He was going to got back and end it with her and stay with his lady here. He was going to go on vacation, he mentioned to his lady, not to talk to the other guy, he told her that the other guy was no good, he was a good talker, and whatever she does, don't listen to him, he's a great bull shitter too. If she will sleep with him it would be over between them. He said, he going to be back in two weeks, if she cheat and be with that other guy, it's over. So one Saturday she went out, unfortunately she went on base. Of course, you know who was there. He told her, why is she waiting for him, he probably sleeping with his girlfriend now, don't be a fool. She listened and had a few drinks, and you know the rest, she was under his sheets and she slept with him. She was hurt,and said she going to deny it when he get back. He came back in town, when to her place and ask for his stuff, she said why? He said, I told you not to sleep with him, I broke up with my girlfriend and you do this to me, It's over. He moved on. He put in for orders and left the Air bases. She went to the other guy and ask if he want to try to start something, he told her, you crazy, all I wanted was sex! Get the fuck away from me. So as life passed everybody moved on. Years later, about 15yrs, I was visiting some older military friends I knew. This one older guy come to the BBQ and he has a much younger woman with him. I said, I know her, and behold. I was my buddy in the military lady. This guy was 30yrs older. She was embarrass to see me, especially after all these year. So I kept it brief and only said hi, and how is things? She said hi, and not good, I mess up, years ago. I made some bad "CHOICES"!!!!!!
1 comment
Posted:Mar 21, 2014 11:45 am
Last Updated:Mar 25, 2014 4:03 pm

Be careful of what you say, It might be used against you. A man is not nothing if he don't keep his word. There are times, when we might promises, we can't keep, but don't say nothing if you don't mean it. I been around people, family member that say something and no intend on fulfilling what they say. I guess I was that way too, I meant to do what I say, but like the people I knew, I thought It wasn't a big deal. I worked at a school one time and one of the teachers was my friend. I told her I written a play and wanted to act it out to see how long the play was. I figure about an hour. She said, after school she would help he rehearse my play, and see can see how it the play was. This was a Thursday, and I told I would bring in the script tomorrow, which was Friday. Friday came, I had the script and I said to myself, I might as well leave it home, because she probably forgotten what she said, and will be too busy to help me out, no big deal. I worked started work at 3:30, school was out at 3:00. My supervisor mentioned to me that my friend was looking for me. So I walking the school before my shift and ran in to her. She said, let go rehearse the play now, I told her, I didn't bring it in, she say why? I said, I was no big deal! She was teary eyed and said, you gave your word! Wow! All that night at work, I was in a daze, and that weekend I was too. I guess, it was important, what might not be important to one person, maybe we vital to another. I was messed up and I told a friend what happen. He said, I was just a lousy play! MY WORD! He said something they make me think, "MY WORD", means a lot to her, from that day it meant a lot to me. I bought the play in the following Monday, we rehearsed it , it took about 50 min. I apologized to her that I would never stay nothing that don't plan to keep. If I promise or say anything to anybody, I would be A MAN OF "MY WORD"!!!!
1 comment
"Aint that foolish"?
Posted:Mar 21, 2014 8:58 am
Last Updated:Mar 23, 2014 8:06 am

WOW! When you in love , you make some foolish decisions. We would sign our life away if asked. The red flags are in front of us, but we too blind to see them. We would take a person who has nothing, and give them the world, knowing they could care-less about us. But hoping one day they would love us. I was in a love triangle. The woman I loved, didn't love me, and she loved a man that didn't love her. I got with a woman, that loved me, and I lost her, because I wanted the woman that didn't love me. That foolish! The woman I loved treated me bad, and was a lousy girlfriend. But the same woman gave her heart to a man who abuse her, didn't work, and didn't come home on the weekend. Talking about being a fool, we both played that part. There are many of us in love triangles. We want someone that don't want us, that's life. Because if a person know you love them unconditional, they will shit on you, hopefully not literally. You will never get their best. They will call you if they in need, and you might help out hoping they will see what you doing and fall for you. WRONG! Remember if a person love you, they won't do you wrong. I know a person who got with a person with nothing, she written out a contract, and say if you love me you would sign this, granted they came in the relationship with NOTHING. Dumb ass sign the papers, and they left with something. I hate to tell you who was dumb ass, well you know. Anyway I have a family member in the same situation, it's must be something in our blood or DNA, we know how to pick them! This family member been married 35yrs to the same woman, been miserable, his wife is mean, rude, didn't get along with his mom. His sister don't like her to this day. Everything is about her. He retired and finally left her, he moved to Va. while she stayed living in NY. He was separated and ran into a girlfriend he has over 40yrs ago. She was divorced, and she always loved him. He was dating her, and she treated him like a king! She loved him after all these year! He dated her for about 6 months, she was so happy and was hoping they would be an item again. At the time my mom was still alive, and he mentioned to her he need some to talk to, so she talked to him, and he mentioned that he was going back to his wife. My mom was shocked! She said, this is same woman how made you miserable for 35 year? And you going back? He said, yes. So he broke the woman heart who care for him for over 40yrs and went back to the one how made him miserable for 35 yrs. "AIN'T THAT FOOLISH"???????
1 comment
Posted:Mar 15, 2014 5:00 pm
Last Updated:Mar 15, 2014 5:04 pm

The most important to all of is our temple, it's not good for anything if we don't take of it. Our temple consists of three different things, our mind, body and soul. We take care of these and we would become invincible, nothing can break up down. But it's not easy to build up out temple, it don't take brick or bone, or even stick or stone, because our temple is made out of flesh. It takes hard work, the desire and drive to achieve the high archery of mastering our temple. Being lazy isn't the way, one way is to seek knowledge, reading, taking classes, anything to enhance our minds, because our mind is the main central point of our temple. The mind is a terrible thing to waste, if you don't use it, you lose it. We need our mind to accomplish our goals in life. Our body, is the second part, that give us eternal life, longevity is we take care of it. By something so simple as eating right, there are four food group, meat, vegetables, starch, and fruit. We must eat a well balance meal, cut back on sweet, and carbs, and exercise, for at least 30min at a time, the first 20min is getting your body ready and the last 10min you actually losing fat. I just getting back into the swing of things myself, I got lazy and let my temple crumble, now I got to build it back up, I use to get depress, the doctor gave me a great advice, exercise! When I do, I don't get depress and my immune system is strong and get sick hardly at all, because my body is part of my temple. This is the third vital part of our temple is our soul. The soul is spiritual part, that give life to the body and many religions believes it live forever. The immortal essence of a person, what makes up happy, what defines us. It give us the ability to feel kindness, sympathy for our fellow man or woman, and give us the passion for love. So all three is important, one can't work without the other. So if we try to go through life without maintaining all three part of our temple, we would fall apart and lose, "OUR TEMPLE".

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