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Just a hint, guys...
Posted:Nov 17, 2021 7:24 pm
Last Updated:May 22, 2022 1:18 am

Treat your partner(s) so well that when you ask "can I have a quickie just for myself" they answer with a very enthusiastic "yes." Then you know you are a good partner.
Random person meeting
Posted:Oct 1, 2021 6:13 am
Last Updated:May 22, 2022 1:18 am

I was waiting for some lunch from a food truck, and a pretty woman asked me what number I had. To my good fortune, it was "69" so I said so, and added that "it seems like an auspicious number, but perhaps not right now." She laughed and blushed (in body language, her skin tone was too dark to tell if blood actually rushed to her face). We then chatted about work, COVID-19, food, the weather, and where we were from. She said she could tell I was born "in the north, because of your accent." Given I've lived north of the Mason-Dixon for all but 2 years of my life up to now, that was funny to me. After all, based on the dictionary, I speak with a very mild accent compared to the "book pronunciation" - only a scholar could probably tell the difference. She had the typical Alabama dialect, where "why" is pronounced "wah" and "no" is pronounced "nah" but she was fun to talk to and attractive too, and I think we both felt good about making a human connection. (I'd do her in a heartbeat if she gave consent, but that seems unlikely given I don't even know exactly what office she's in so it would be difficult to find excuses to talk to her. I'm not a stalker by nature, so that is right out.)

I guess the upshot is, it really doesn't matter what you talk about, it is the actual making of connection and community with other human beings that is important, and makes life worthwhile.
Here's hoping Standard Contacts helps
Posted:Sep 3, 2021 6:16 am
Last Updated:May 22, 2022 1:18 am

I've sent a lot of messages, and not a lot of responses. Not a "go away" or "no thank you" or even a "fuck off" except for scammers. I'm hoping some real women will bother to answer now.
Moving to a new place
Posted:Aug 3, 2021 9:11 am
Last Updated:Nov 14, 2021 3:09 pm

The last place I was at (NW of Philadelphia) was a relatively sparse area, and I knew that when I signed up for Heated Affairs. I wasn't wrong. I mostly saw the same profiles over and over again, and not a lot new. However, I did learn patience and realized I must look at *all* the matches, as there were some possibles that I found very deep in the search results.

I was ultimately unsuccessful, as the few people of like mind were very picky about who they met with. That isn't a criticism, everyone has the absolute right to body autonomy and their likes and dislikes. It was just an unfortunate confluence of events.

So here I am in a new place (Huntsville area) and looking for pretty much the same as before. I'm hoping for better luc I'm hoping that a much larger population will allow me just one good match that turns real. I'm not a glutton or an entitled narcissist - I am not hoping for a flood of perfect matches. Just one that I can win over with my personality eventually. I am patient, and I'd rather have one long term FWB or NSA. I have NO INTEREST in tricking a bunch of ladies into one night stands, who then hate me because I wasn't anything close to what I said I was.
1 comment
Looking for X or Y but finding everything else.
Posted:Dec 2, 2019 6:10 am
Last Updated:Nov 14, 2021 3:13 pm

I have been on here for a few months, looking for a female FWB or NSA. So far I have what appears be a man who thinks I am hot. It is very flattering but my appreciation for the form is limited. Now, I might have a great time, I don't know. He is also interested in a mfm, which I am not opposed at all. The problem is finding a woman. I have spoken with some women who were lukewarm the idea of me, and really wanted a couple. In other words, a woman.

Is it just me, or is anyone else sensing a pattern?

Considering there are a significant number of women who wouldn't be caught dead admitting they want sex, that limits the number and type of women on here. Then you subtract those who want long-term, exclusive relationships or other "traditional" relationships; then subtract the ones who are on another site*, and you can get an idea just how slim the pickings are.

*Speaking of other sites, isn't it odd that this site advertises another hookup site (GetItOn)? Sounds like the same company trying to grab more . If this were an ethical company would pool the people rather than make you sign up and for another membership.
1 comment
Dick pics - when in doubt, just don't.
Posted:Nov 7, 2019 8:32 am
Last Updated:May 22, 2022 1:18 am

Guys - unless the individual in question requests the dick pic, just don't. (I have seen profiles actually require dick pics or you won't be considered. If you see one, go for the gold!)


1) most women have seen plenty of cocks live and in person, so they know what one looks like, and know there is plenty of variation. You're not likely to show her anything really novel. Even if you're one of those very few men blessed with 9" or bigger, it still is just a penis. Looks like any other, except for size. Just tell her you've got a whopper. If she wants proof, then have at it.

2) it isn't your most important feature for most women

3) she'll ask you if she wants one.

4) doing that proves you're an aggressive misogynist and only care about shocking or dominating. It proves, at best, you're a dildo with a face. At worst, it may indicate you are a jerk who will hump her until you come, then exit as soon as you can, leaving her unsatisfied and feeling ill-used.

In summary - if she doesn't ask, don't show.
Block Zoe_Paige
Posted:Oct 31, 2019 12:10 pm
Last Updated:May 22, 2022 1:18 am

All she wants to do is drive traffic to her webcam.
To clarify what I mean by FWB
Posted:Oct 24, 2019 1:22 pm
Last Updated:May 22, 2022 1:18 am

Are you looking for Mr. Right, but in the meantime might be interested in Mr. Right Now?

I want you to know I take great pleasure in making sure my partner has fun too. If I can get my partner to orgasm, I am satisfied with that, whether I later, or not at all.

Making my partner's pleasure my priority actually makes for a better relationship in the longer term. And it isn't all goal oriented, either. Sometimes, just caressing curves or touching the textures without pressure for performance can be very fulfilling for both.

Being a proper friend with means emphasizing the friends part. This means talking and being mutually supportive, and that is a big turn-on since the largest and most important erogenous zone is the brain. As an example, my last FWB was laid up in the hospital for several days. I visited her, brought her good coffee instead of the nasty hospital stuff, and brought food once she was strong enough. It really meant a lot to her.

So if this seems like the kind of FWB you want, let me know. That is what I mean FWB.
What I find slightly amusing and slightly annoying
Posted:Oct 20, 2019 9:18 am
Last Updated:May 22, 2022 1:18 am

People don't respond at all, then wonder why you message them again.

To link to this blog (rakordubro) use [blog rakordubro] in your messages.

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Most Recent Comments by Others

Post Poster Post Date
Sex vs. Love (2)HAMONMAN
Nov 12, 2021 9:18 am
Moving to a new place (1)HAMONMAN
Aug 3, 2021 10:32 am
Looking for X or Y but finding everything else. (1)orgmaker2020
Jan 4, 2020 6:30 pm
Cheating - does it always mean a bad marriage? (6)jajo696
Oct 31, 2019 12:38 pm
My Experiences with Scammers and Fakes (1)HAMONMAN
Oct 17, 2019 12:53 pm