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Self Esteem and Confidence
Posted:Apr 4, 2016 10:16 am
Last Updated:Apr 4, 2016 12:13 pm
6607 Views

I work with the public in customer service on a part time basis. I love what I do; talking with people, smiling, remembering things we talked about on their last visit etc. In fact, there are many who wait specifically for me to assist them rather than waiting in lines. Of course some move to another line if I am going to be delayed, but it is nice to know that I am valued and they appreciate my skills and service.

One man said to me once "don't you ever have a bad day? I never see you down or in a bad mood. You are always upbeat and smiling." I told him that sure, I have bad days just like everyone else but I would never show it. I am confident that my life issues and down days don't show on my face. I then mentioned that how would it be that if you said to someone "Hello, how are you today? And they really told you! Usually the response is "fine thank you, how are you?" There are those folks that do unload when you ask them, I get that often. I will generally say, "Thank you for coming in and we will see you next time you are here." But some do need to be heard! I can remember an old saying that my late Grandmother told me once.

"if we all put our problems in one big pile, told to choose one, you would pull your own back out because there is always some one worse off than you are."

I think it is best to always be kind to anyone that crosses your path. You never know what they have gone through in their life and we should be sensitive to that fact. Golden rule - treat others as you wish to be treated.

Have a simply fabulous Monday!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
1 comment
Meet and Greets
Posted:Mar 24, 2016 11:45 am
Last Updated:Mar 25, 2016 9:38 am
6925 Views

Here in southern California, there haven't been any meet and greet events that I know of in a couple of years. One I decided to attend was in 2013 hosted by the SoCal chat room. It sounded like a fun time and everyone in the room was anxious about the date. I live in Ventura County which is about 2 hours north of where the event was going to be, specifically in the city of Oceanside which is north San Diego county. It was located very close to the marine base Camp Pendleton. It is a very nice area of southern California - mostly.

I drove there and my GPS took me directly to the address. Well, was I ever so surprised to see that it was a dive bar in a "questionable" part of town. I parked across the street and watched as people were going in. I saw folks with purple hair, tall mohawk hair cuts and some dressed with no shirt on but just vests and jeans that had holes in them and leather and metal boots. This included females as well as males! Everyone was in their 40's or younger and looked like maybe they sang in a heavy metal band! I gave it some time and decided not to go in. I was dressed in a black skirt, white sweater wearing a string of pearls and low black high heeled pumps. Clearly I was over dressed! So I drove home. The next day I went into the chat room and just watched the conversations.

Apparently there were some fights that started in the parking lot; someone was arrested for having a concealed weapon and the list goes on. These were not necessarily folks from the chat room but I am sure glad I didn't go in to the event after all! I guess I was expecting a better class of people and meeting those who I had good conversation with online. There haven't been anymore meet and greet events locally that I know of since then. I chat in the 50+ Mature Room often and they said they hosted one in Las Vegas two years ago. That would be more my speed with folks my own age! They said they all had fun...

Have any of you ever attended a meet and greet and met nice folks from Heated Affairs?

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
3 Comments
Voting Days of Past
Posted:Mar 16, 2016 11:44 am
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2016 9:47 am
6783 Views

Do any of you recall in years past that on voting day bars were closed and you were not able to purchase alcohol until the polls closed at 8pm?

I was telling someone about this at work, and she is younger than me, like in her 40's I would say. She said she never heard of that and I told her to maybe ask her parents if they remember it. When I was growing up in the late 50's, early 60's I can remember this exclusively because my parents were heavy drinkers. They always complained that they couldn't go to the market and buy any beer on voting day. I think they began to "stock up" in preparation as years went on so they wouldn't run out of beer. My folks were serious alcoholics.

Also I remember going with my parents when they voted and it was always in someone's garage in the neighborhood. So we walked there, and in San Diego in November the evenings were damp and chilly (we lived near the beach). As a I always wondered how someone's garage could magically turn into "polls" so we could get a new president!! LOL My little girl vivd imagination ran wild I guess. I used to go to the local Moose Lodge in my city when I was married. But when I had to work 2 jobs after my divorce, I discovered Absentee Ballot voting and signed up for that. I was always under the impression that was for elderly people only who were housebound! I researched it and have now voted Absentee for about 10 years. It is much more convenient!

Do any of you baby boomers remember any of this growing up?

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
3 Comments
Covered Faces
Posted:Mar 2, 2016 3:46 pm
Last Updated:Mar 4, 2016 5:39 pm
7427 Views

I have seen so many photos on this site with the black or white strips covering the face or the eyes. Now, why would anyone ever do that if they were not being deceptive? I see men in suits, some in tee shirts and shorts and of course others (most of them) naked with their cocks showing. Some say they are married and/or attached, hence the face shielding, but I can't understand why any of them would even post any picture where they feel they have to cover the face. Why not just post nothing? That is such a turn off to me; then of course there are those body shots clothed and nude where the head is completely cut off from the picture.

That I can understand better; but the strip covering the face just screams deception to me. I am sure there are women who do that as well; most likely married or attached. I have posted my best assets in most of my pictures and there is one of me with my face showing from the waist up. I just think it's better to be honest than try to hide anything and if you are afraid a wife or significant other or even a colleague from work will see you here then why post anything at all? If they find you they are doing the same thing here!

Could they be thinking of the old saying "the eyes are the window to one's soul" and don't want us to see the guilt there? Just something I thought of today and decided to write about it.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
4 Comments
Cell Phones in Public
Posted:Feb 18, 2016 8:25 pm
Last Updated:Feb 23, 2016 11:14 am
7189 Views

Is it just me, or does anyone else notice that when someone is speaking into their cell phone in a public place they tend to shout? I find that the majority of these folks are men but many women do it as well. This could be in a grocery store, a restaurant, in line at a sporting event or even at the bank or a doctor's office. I have noticed now that some banks and the local pharmacy has signs requesting no cell phone use during a transaction. Customer needs to be fully attentive and aware of what is transpiring with his transaction.

When I was managing banking offices for many years, if a customer walked up to the window and was on his or her phone, I instructed the teller to NOT process the transaction until the customer was finished with his conversation. If he continued, I simply moved him over to an empty window and had the teller call the next customer up to be assisted. If the cell phone user was being loud I would ask him to please tone it down a bit. Most times they are oblivious to how loud they are speaking. Once they finished on the phone, then I would walk up to them, take their deposit, withdrawal slip or whatever they needed done to a teller and bring him back a receipt and cash, or pertinent paperwork. I find it rude behavior to be on a phone call in public and the people around should not have to listen to conversations that should remain private.

Personally for me, if my phone rings and I am in a public place I will quickly silent it and then it can go to voice mail for me to retrieve and return the call when I am finished with my public errand. Not that many years ago, one would need to find a phone booth to make a call; then "beepers" came into existence and again, a phone needed to be located to return the call to the printed out number on the beeper. Times have changed drastically; I was out to dinner a few weeks ago and saw a young couple sitting at a table near by. Both of them were texting on their phones, looking down; never saying word to each other.I watched to see if it was just for a minute, but this went on for sometime. I find it incredibly sad that we have come to this; the human touch, real conversation and actual interaction with people has been replaced by modern technology.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
5 Comments
Sliced Deli Turkey
Posted:Feb 9, 2016 10:36 am
Last Updated:Feb 11, 2016 4:36 am
6955 Views

I was at my local market yesterday to get a few groceries on my way home from work. As I do weekly, I go to the deli to get my 1/2 pound of turkey breast sliced for sandwiches for my lunches. As I was waiting, having small talk with the guy who was slicing the turkey, a man marched up to the counter and started yelling at the guy about a pre-made sandwich he had just bought. It was half eaten and the guy actually threw the sandwich in the wrapper at the deli guy. He said "Look! The lettuce is wilted, there is only one slice of turkey and the bread is hard! I want you to make me a new sandwich right now!" As the deli guy looked at the sandwich on the floor, then at me, he said "as soon as I am done with this customer I will assist you." The man was PISSED and said he was going be late back to work. So I said to the deli guy, go ahead and take care of this rude asshole and get him out of here. The man looked at me and I said, "you know, there is no reason to throw a fit, stomp your feet and act like a damn in public." He replied back to me "I do not take bad service or bad food very well and I will make that known as loudly as I can." I then said "Obviously your mother didn't teach you any manners and if you only knew how stupid you look you would have been more patient." He had to have weighed at least 350 pounds so I guess his self-esteem/self image is very low.

People like that is what makes the retail business so difficult for hard working employees. It's sad too when we know they only make minimum wage at best. So now I make sure to tell anyone I come in contact with in a retail environment that I appreciate the good service and their smile. (When I get it of course). If not, then I just politely walk away and say "thank you." Retail is TOUGH enough and the "John Q Public" idiots can sometimes make it tougher on employees.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
7 Comments
Parking The Vehicle
Posted:Jan 25, 2016 9:01 pm
Last Updated:Feb 2, 2016 9:25 pm
7015 Views

There is something I need to ask, specifically to the men audience. I have wondered about this for some years and continue to see it on a daily basis.

Why is it necessary for men to BACK IN to parking spaces that are against a wall, or in a driveway, or in a parking lot of say an apartment building or condo complex? Big trucks, SUV's, vans, sedans or compact cars. Doesn't matter; when most guys park these vehicles they usually will back it in to the spot.

I can't understand why simply pulling forward in to the spot is not an option? Is this how a man's brain is wired with regard to which way the vehicle should be facing? Or does it have to do with when the vehicle leaves the spot? Backing out versus going forward to leave? I hope someone here can explain it to me so I will understand better the next time i see this.

Thanks in advance Guys!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
11 Comments
Jury Duty
Posted:Jan 18, 2016 10:58 am
Last Updated:Jan 18, 2016 2:38 pm
6959 Views

Recently I was summoned to jury duty in my county here in California. Typically, it's considered "one and done" if your name isn't called to go up to a court room and be interviewed by the attorneys and the judge. I did get called to a court room but it took two days before I was interviewed due to the number of potential jurors. But since it was a trial involving a gang member and a weapon was used I was thanked and excused. I have been involved in a couple of strong arm bank robberies in my banking career over the years as a branch manager and was considered by the defense to be possibly prejudiced against the defendant. I couldn't say for sure unless I had heard the facts.

Anyway, in the two days I was there, I looked around and saw how people were dressed. I saw tee shirts, shorts, tennis shoes, jeans that were torn and overall way too casual dress in my opinion. A young girl actually wore black yoga type pants, sandals and a sleeveless tank top. Many didn't even have their hair combed looking like they just woke up. I wore a jacket with matching slacks and a nice blouse with low heels both days. Doesn't anyone have respect anymore these days? I realize not everyone has nice clothes but tee shorts and shorts? I feel like that is disrespectful to the court system to not take pride in one's appearance when serving our community and civic duties. A clean short sleeved shirt with buttons and clean jeans with loafers would have been okay in my opinion. Some of those people were still in the jury of 12 seats being interviewed when I was excused. I wondered to myself if they get chosen as jurors will the judge give them a dress code instruction during the trial?

I know what people wear does not have anything to do with the outcome of the trial and the defendants fate, but HE wore a nice pair of slacks, clean white shirt and tie even with the tattoos on his shaved head and neck. Hopefully that helps him, but if he were in low slung pants with his underwear showing and a wife beater shirt on in the court room would that have sealed his fate?
3 Comments
Handicap Parking Spaces
Posted:Jan 10, 2016 6:21 pm
Last Updated:Jul 10, 2016 6:29 am
7742 Views

I witnessed a rather unusual conversation today as I was walking across the parking lot to my car at a local grocery store. A young woman parked her new Lexus (dealer tags still) in a handicapped space. The required placard was clearly visible. An older man was approaching near her just as she was exiting her car dressed in a nice outfit with high heels. The man said to her "You sure don't appear to be handicapped, why are you parking here taking the space away from someone who really needs it?" She said "It's my Mother's car and she is handicapped." As she was walking away the man said that he didn't see the Mother with her or even sitting in the car. She ignored him, kept walking and the man just shook his head as he walked away.

My former husband used to do this very thing. He would pull into a handicapped space saying "I'm just going to be right back." I used to scold him telling him he should be DAMN glad he doesn't need that spot and to be considerate of others. Well as mean and selfish as he is he continued doing this on occasion. In passing conversation with my recently, she mentioned that "Dad got a ticket the other day," and of course I just had to ask what it was for thinking it was probably speeding. Karma is a BITCH! $250 fine for parking in handicapped!! My said he was livid and plans to fight it; he doesn't want to pay the fine because he was "only gone" from the car for less than 10 minutes and the fact that there were other handicap spots available. I say, GOOD LUCK on that...Another reminder why I am single!

I suspect the gal in the Lexus today will continue to take advantage of this so she can walk a short distance in those 5 inch high heels to get to the market!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
11 Comments
The Brain of a Married Man
Posted:Dec 28, 2015 10:44 am
Last Updated:Feb 23, 2016 10:29 am
7071 Views

I would love to be a scientist and study the brains of human beings....especially the brain of a married man. Then perhaps I could fully understand their thought processes when it comes to women who "cross paths "with them. This post obviously is directed at the married male audience but please, anyone who has any insight is more than welcome to share their opinions and views.

A "married man" means that they are fully committed in mind body and soul to ONE person, correct? Their spouse. Their wife. Which to me, would mean he shares his whole life with her, with the exception of hobbies and his job.

He wears a gold wedding band that she placed on his finger during the wedding vows. He promises to be true and faithful only unto her. But perhaps there are those times when he removes that ring temporarily or just doesn't wear it at all. Does he forget he is committed and married then?

The sex with his wife gets boring or she isn't interested in it anymore due to middle age changes in her body OR worse, he doesn't make her feel sexy and special anymore. The flowers for no reason stop, no compliments of any kind to her, much less a pat on the fanny, a hug or kiss for no particular reason. They live like roommates; if there are involved they "co-parent" them.

He gets tired of masturbating often and wants some real pussy action...and decides Heated Affairs is the place to get it. He creates a profile, with NO picture, with NO marital status posted - sometimes though he does state he is married. And doesn't get a hell of a lot of response because if it. But sometimes hits the jackpot and finds a sexy gal who responds to him.

Now the lies start to the wife. He has to work late, he has to go on a business trip for a weekend or even a week. He gets a phone call or text and he tells the wife his buddy needs help with something. He meets his "other woman" and they have amazing sex and a lot of it. The "other woman" is smitten and falling so in love with him..and he knows it. Giving her gifts and attention...on his schedule. Holidays come - and she spends them alone but he doesn't.

So, after all of that....he still remains married and often breaks dates at the last minute due to a "family issue" or a "honey-do" list wife gives him that he is guilted into doing for her and the other woman is left alone with all the preparations and trouble she went to getting ready to see her married man.

Does the married man's brain seriously and really think this is all okay? Does he not realize the lives he is affecting with this behavior? Or is his throbbing cock and guilty conscience leading him at the same time? I wish I could understand why, a married man would continue on in an unhappy marriage and not get a divorce to be happy? I understand about finances and how that could all be affected but does the money really mean THAT much? If he built all of that up with his wife as his partner for many years then he deserves to risk half of it. As the old saying goes "Know why divorce is so expensive? Because it's worth it!"

The other woman tries hard to end things.....and one day finally does it. But her heart is full of memories and love for her married man knowing she will hurt for a while - and he remains married, most likely moving on to his next victim.

Are married men's brains really wired this way? Or have I been referring to the brain located behind his zipper that trumps all common sense?

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
6 Comments
The "Padlock" Look and Smelling Good
Posted:Dec 27, 2015 6:41 am
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2015 7:22 pm
6842 Views

I have always liked the look of a well trimmed beard or goatee on a man. I think it is sexy, and masculine looking. The padlock look which is the goatee and mustache around his mouth and on the chin is my favorite. Of course the clean shaved look is nice too especially if he smells good. Nothing like a little tiny splash of cologne or after shave to get my attention. For me personally, I like to smell good for my man too. When I am all showered and groomed, hair and make-up perfect, ready to walk out the door, I will spray a little perfume in to the air and walk into it. That way it will fall on my hair and be just enough. That has seemed to work for me for years and has become part of my daily grooming routine. I do like to be "au natural" though during certain times.....also there is nothing sexier to me than the natural scent of an aroused man!

Everyone have a wonderful Sunday day and enjoy the last week of 2015!!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
1 comment
Sunday Morning Chat Surprise
Posted:Dec 20, 2015 10:49 am
Last Updated:Dec 24, 2015 10:35 am
6104 Views

I was just having the nicest IM conversation with a man who contacted me about an hour ago. We live within 25 miles of each other. We talked about our jobs, our family a little bit, the holiday next week and our plans with family.

We began to talk about our experiences on this site and I told him I had some horror stories I could tell him about in my 5 years here as a member. Some good stories too and others would make his hair curlier than mine! He "laughed" and told me he liked my personality and humor. I mentioned that laughter is so good for the soul and I try to find humor in most things, and I don't take life too seriously especially my interactions on this site. It's kind of a guilty pleasure for me here. I am also a member on another "vanilla" site and those men seem a bit stuffy and boring...I have fun here on Heated Affairs and have met and dated men and a couple of them were for an extended period of time.

Then he told about his opinion and philosophy regarding the women on this site. He said he could sum it all up in one sentence titled the 4 "F's". I asked him what that was........

He typed the following:

"FIND THEM. FEEL THEM, FUCK THEM and FORGET THEM." I told him that was interesting to say the least and a great way to joke about the women members on here. He said he wasn't joking whatsoever and that's exactly what he does. When I read that, I nonchalantly told him I needed to go get ready for my day of shopping and wrapping gifts for family and I thanked him for the chat. Then I BLOCKED him and sent him to the Heated Affairs "bug jar." His loss indeed........

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
2 Comments
Christmas Memories From a Baby Boomer
Posted:Dec 18, 2015 2:14 pm
Last Updated:Dec 23, 2015 6:41 pm
6250 Views

I love Christmas and always have. Growing up, my siblings and I were so very excited to see the one big present Santa would bring us. Like one year I got a 2 foot tall bride doll standing up near the tree; another year I got a Mickey Mouse watch with a thick pink band. Another year when I was a little older I got a square white transistor radio with a wide handle and a supply of 9 volt batteries. Our stocking always was one of our own from our underwear drawer; Santa always left some walnuts, a candy cane, curly hard candies and also an apple and orange. That was such a treat and we squealed with excitement!

As time went on and I had my own family starting in the 70's, I tried to keep things on the down low as far as Santa. I did get my a bit more than I got as a , to mean a few more gifts to actually open. They did have their own stockings too but got a little more than walnuts, candy canes and fruit. I am sure it wasn't much more but they were happy. Now they have their own families and I am shocked at the material things Christmas stands for these days. It has become so much more commercialized that my heart breaks. The true meaning of what Christmas is all about is gone...My grandchildren are spoiled beyond belief when it comes to material things, toys, electronics etc.

The shopping nightmares; folks shooting one another over a parking spot at the mall; gifts getting stolen from cars and also porches that were delivered by UPS; people waiting days in line to get inside a store on black Fridays; spraying mace on someone so they can't get to certain merchandise; people being rude and using road rage on the streets near the malls.....and the list goes on. Many stores stay open even on Thanksgiving and Christmas day. When I was growing up you couldn't find a place to buy a quart of milk if you ran out on a holiday!

What has happened to our world? This season, I am doing a random act of kindness. Not sure what it is yet but I will do one...pay it forward in some way, help someone less fortunate than myself. Thats what Christmas is all about to me...and it wouldn't hurt to be like that anytime we can. God bless us all!

Holiday {=} {=} KCClaire0923
6 Comments

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