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Need For Attention Hair Color
Posted:Sep 13, 2016 6:03 pm
Last Updated:Sep 14, 2016 8:29 pm

I work with the public and every day for about the past year or so I am shocked at what I see on some women. Younger women, middle agers and even older women in my age group. The hair colors I see just jump out and are so bizarre sometimes I have to stare. Bright blood red, hot pink, purple, bright blue, yellow and even deep green. And it's not even Halloween yet! I wonder what makes them think that these bizarre colors are attractive or feminine. I realize also that in today's world it's customary for women to have several tattoos and piercings.

Recently I saw a picture of a co-workers on her wedding day. She is 31 and such a pretty girl. She had a beautiful white lacy wedding gown on; and her arms were covered from her wrists to her shoulders in tattoos. Her back and neck had several tattoos as well and then her hair she dyed bright blue to match her flowers and bridesmaids dresses. How this world and customs have changed!

Personally for me I would want to be plain and a naturally beautiful bride for my wedding day so my , grandkids and great grandkids can be proud when they look at the picture and not see a "clown bride". . I wonder if any of these women have even had a thought about how those things will look on them when they are 80 or 85 and their skin is wrinkled and sagging. But as the old saying goes, "different strokes for different folks." Such a shame too when some of these gals are so darn pretty with great features.

I'm just so glad I was raised when I was and taught to have self esteem with what I was naturally born with and no need to change it!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
The Older Woman Syndrome
Posted:Sep 3, 2016 12:18 pm
Last Updated:Sep 16, 2016 5:31 pm

I have chatted with and met several men over the years that have a preference for older women. As companions, lovers, friends and sometimes much more. It makes me wonder if these types of men are lacking something from childhood or is it really an "attraction" that is real to them. When I talk to them about this, I seem to always get the same three answers but indirectly of course. I realize that age can at times be just a number and has nothing to do with anything other than a number on a piece of paper. It has been common practice that most couples date and end up with each other from their own age group. Not always of course; and many of these relationships can be and are long lasting. Some older men seem to want the younger women; maybe for the "trophy" effect, I don't know. Obviously at least for the young gorgeous and tight body, what man wouldn't want that?

What I hear from younger men that are attracted to us older gals is this:

1) We have no (or at least less) drama in our lives
2) We know what we want in and out of the bedroom
3) We are much more experienced in bed and share that experience willingly

Does this sound familiar to any of you out there? It does seem odd to be with someone younger than my oldest but the experience can be fulfilling too.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
Soon Forgotten Until........
Posted:Aug 20, 2016 11:44 am
Last Updated:Oct 1, 2016 6:54 pm

I would like some opinions and feedback from both females and males about this issue. I already pretty much know the answer(s) and response(s) I will receive but here goes anyway. It's something that is hard for me as a woman to understand but I accept it. This has been going on for a long time too.....

MEN -When you have sexual encounters with a woman, why is it so difficult for you to send a quick note the next day saying "Wow, I really enjoyed yesterday (or Monday or whatever day it was)? Seems like when you really want sex from us you send the messages every day prior saying how horny you are, how much you miss and want us then after actually having sex with us we don't hear from you for days. I know that for a married man, it is because he feels GUILTY and focuses on being sweet and more attentive to his wife and we are pushed into the back ground...until he wants sex from us again and then the sweet messages start up daily. And we respond enthusiastically as if all is well...

MEN....single and married.....WHY do you play with our feelings like that? We feel like we are SO low on your priority list because you put us there. That seems very selfish and for most of us single women it's our own fault for putting up with it. I know for me that is truly the case. I admit it. Most especially when the sex is so HOT and passionate his lack of contact back is overlooked. I wish I could be stronger and maybe someday I will be, I don't know.

Women...has this ever happened to you? How does it make you feel? I clearly know the old saying "NO ONE CAN TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU WITHOUT YOUR PERMISSION" but I would think that the courtesy of an acknowledgement of the last encounter to us women who have given up our bodies for his sexual pleasure is in order. If anything it's using good manners and being tactful.

Opinions anyone?

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
1 comment
Getting Heated Up For HOT Sex
Posted:Aug 13, 2016 4:03 pm
Last Updated:Aug 14, 2016 9:50 pm

For me personally, that first long passionate kiss before having hot sex is what gets me started breathing heavily. Especially with a particular move that a partner I have had does when he kisses me. He will put his open hands on my neck right under my ears with his thumbs rubbing my cheeks and kiss me long and hard. Then his hands move to my long hair where he brushes it back gently......still kissing me. And finally his hands moving down my shoulders then to my breasts.

The rest I will leave to your visual imagination and let's just say that this person and I have had a very long sexual connection since we met here on Heated Affairs in a chat room first; then in person on 12-12-12. There are reasons we can't be together all the time, so we do cherish the time we do spend, sometimes it's way too short.

Eventually this will end; we both know it. But in the meantime I often think of those hands on my neck right under my ears while enjoying deep long kisses.....

KCClaire0923 {=} {=}
1 comment
Common Courtesy
Posted:Jul 23, 2016 10:56 am
Last Updated:Sep 3, 2016 1:54 pm

I have a part time job in retail, working in the accounting office and then sometimes as a back-up cashier on the front end when needed. Every day I encounter some very nice kind customers and then there are those who are rude and use no manners. It can be very dis-heartening.

For me, I can handle those types because I am retired from managing banking offices for 27 years. I know how to put people in their place when they are out of line; I can do it politely and professionally and will not allow them to intimidate me in any way. I usually train new cashiers and many times this is their first job right out of high school so I keep an eye on them and their customers when I can. They get the deer in the headlights look at times...

People can be rude and disrespectful especially when they know an employee is young and new. I know I would never act that way in public no matter who is helping me. If I get bad service I just go to the manager or write a letter to headquarters. I have seen people literally throw their grocery items on to the moving belt cussing or griping about one thing or another. Some comments can range from "are you that stupid?" or "I want my groceries packed right this time" or "why don't you know when this item will be on the shelf? You work here don't you?" That's when a manager or myself will step in. Many times I hear the cashier say "thank you" at the end of the transaction and the customer just walks away. If that happens to me I simply say "Your welcome" as they walk away. Same thing if I hold a door open or get a grocery basket for them to use and they don't acknowledge it. I usually say "your welcome."

What happened to old fashioned manners, common courtesy and respect? I hate to think of what the world will be when my grandchildren grow up! At least I find comfort in that they have been taught right and hope they use it!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
1 comment
Profiles With Overkill Pictures
Posted:Jul 12, 2016 11:20 am
Last Updated:Jul 12, 2016 12:59 pm

Sometimes I notice profiles with a lot of pictures posted. Like well over 100 or more. Once i ran across one that had over 1000 photos and he had over 2000 friends in his network. It makes me think that perhaps these types of folks are needy or possibly just lonely for attention. Obviously the pictures were from many years ago and up to the present time. I "declined" his friend request to me, I feel it is a waste of time only to be added as a number to him...NO thanks.

I do think it i important to have a few pictures posted; for me I have a face shot then a few of my best "assets" that I took with my phone over the past couple of years. I thought they looked classy and decided to post them. Other than that, I would NEVER post a mirage of photos and some I have seen even are of one's hobbies and pets. Then of course they post their "JUNK" in a state of arousal and those I delete when they send me a message. It is such a turn off; men are trying to prove a point before even meeting much less chatting. Why would I want to see his junk before I see his face? I would much prefer to discover what he has for a package AFTER we meet if there is chemistry....There is so much penis envy here between men and often I wonder how many of those pictures are real and true and possibly photo shopped.

Any way, do you find that having several pictures posted is of interest to you? To each his own I guess, but I find it boring, redundant and yes, NEEDY.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
Responding to Men That Contact Me
Posted:Jul 2, 2016 10:36 am
Last Updated:Jul 2, 2016 5:01 pm

I always appreciate the number of men that attempt to contact me by sending a regular message or seeing me over on IM. I respond to ALL contact by declining politely or saying yes and chatting or I send a "yes" reply to his regular message so we can chat.

One thing that is very annoying to me with this is that a vast majority do NOT read my introduction and requirements of who and what I will respond to. When I say this, I am referring to Gold members mostly who can clearly read my profile page but choose to ignore what I have written.

I do NOT want contact from married men - PERIOD. I have learned that those married men who are members here have no intention of ever changing their situations and I have had my heart broken over this; I do not ever intend to get involved with another married man. I don't care that he gets no sex at home; or that his wife lost all interest in sex; or that she has an illness that prevents her from having sex, or that she is a raving BITCH most if the time. I don't care. Or even if she has "given him permission" to be on this site (so he says) I don't believe that. So do not waste your time trying to contact me if you are a married man. I will delete the message and block your profile. TOO MUCH DRAMA for this girl and I have zero drama in my life.

If you are a smoker (0f ANYTHING) I will not respond. If you are under age 50 I will not respond. If you are bi-sexual or have any interest in dating T-Gurls I will not respond (too risky health wise). If you have long hair (I prefer the shorter clean cut look) or do not bother to shower or brush your teeth daily I will not respond. Most of all, if you are all about yourself and unkind, I will not respond.

With all of that being said (and it sounds like a lot but it's really not) here is what I will respond to, especially if there is chemistry in chatting and then when finally meeting in person......

Just be fairly local to me, a normal, single, sweet and decent guy over age 50 that loves good sex and wants to spend time in and OUT of the bedroom. When I say single, it means NOT married, but SINGLE, divorced or widowed. If you say you are "separated" does she know you are separated? I doubt that. You enjoy taking a drive for the day, like up the coast stopping for lunch or dinner; or going to a movie, or even walking the beach holding hands...just because it feels right. I am not looking to get married again and I pay my OWN bills not dependent on any man for that. I just am searching for a guy that fills my physical needs and emotional with that being said please READ MY PROFILE before contacting me. It will save you time and then you won't wonder why I deleted and blocked you. I am a member on a couple of other "vanilla" sites and had some good luck - but not long lasting for one reason or another. No chemistry, family drama or he lives too far away.

Again, it's really not too much to ask but please read the main profile page first...most of us women appreciate that very much!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
Number of Married Men Here
Posted:Jun 20, 2016 5:49 pm
Last Updated:Jun 21, 2016 11:38 am

I have been a member here on Heated Affairs since 2011. The number of married men on this site is so over whelming to me. They should rename this site "Heated Affairs Married Men Site." Yes I have had my share of chatting and meeting one or two of these men but being last on their priority list really stinks. Their explanations as to why they are members here is always the same......

!) Sex is nonexistent or has become stale
2) She is a bitch all or most of the time
3) She has let herself go and is not attractive anymore
4) I feel unwanted and she has no romantic tendencies
5) I am just a paycheck to her and not a husband

The list can go on and on. We single women on this site prefer to be a priority to those men we give our bodies to but of course a married man has his family/wife commitments. I feel like I am only a "piece of ass" and nothing else simply because he can't be here when I need him. The single/divorced and widowed men on this site have the time; but most prefer to also be a "player" like the married men. I guess this just in't the kind of site to find a good monogamous sex partner but I have to say thatAFF is my guilty pleasure. I have attended meet and greet events and made some lifelong friends, both male and female in my age group. Friends I can call on the phone anytime to talk about family, jobs, recipes and relationships.

It feels good to vent about this; I will say that I will never ever get married again but if I did I certainly would take care of my husband in every way so he wouldn't need to look for sex outside our marriage. So I really do "get it." But it can be frustrating especially when there is chemistry and he is married!

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
"Friends Definitions"
Posted:Jun 11, 2016 10:46 am
Last Updated:Jun 14, 2016 7:15 am

I was in my favorite chatroom earlier today and we were discussing people we have met here and on other adult sites. The conversation was about friends with benefits and just friends without benefit status.

So, the consensus was that FWB means there are activities with this person outside the bedroom walls; like going to movies or out to dinner but with no commitment or strings. Strictly friends.

Then we discussed FB which strictly is a "fuck buddy" and no other activity other than in the bedroom. No lingering afterward, just get dressed and leave until the next encounter which usually is initiated by text any time day or night.

I am wondering if any of you have a preference of these two definitions? Of course the married men I have encountered only want FB - nothing else but the physical part. That makes me feel like I am way down on his priority list just past the family dog. Of course I feel more emotional to one of these men and never say "no" like I should especially since it is only on HIS schedule when he sees me. I wish it could be more but his situation will never change and I have to accept that.

If you could choose, FWB or FB which would you have? Just curious.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
1 comment
Repeated Profile Views
Posted:May 17, 2016 10:54 am
Last Updated:May 17, 2016 3:23 pm

For the longest time, I see local men who are actually Gold members that view my profile often. Like once or twice a week. They seem to meet my criteria of not being married or attached (or at least so they say) are in my age group, live within 25 to 50 miles from me and have pictures of their faces posted as the main photo. I can think of three at the moment and I always smile when I see that they have viewed me once again. I do check to be sure they are actually online at that time if I am signed in. Otherwise I see the notification was sent when I am not signed in so they may have viewed me once last year for all I know. Heated Affairs has several things they do to try and make sales understandably.

I know that Heated Affairs uses this notification as a sales tactic at times to make a member think someone has viewed them, but as a 5 year Gold member I usually can tell when that is the case. It's usually ones out of my criteria of what I am seeking. I also can see the three I am referring to on the IM feature at times when I am signed in over there. Are they waiting for me first?, my question to you is this - Do you view a woman's profile often when you find her attractive but never try to contact her? If you do this may I ask the reason why? Are you married and not serious? Shy? Or perhaps she doesn't meet all of your requirements of course, or you might just be pleasuring yourself while looking? I don't know, but I can tell you that the three that view mine often I would respond in a heartbeat if they would only make the first move. I am old fashioned and have a difficult time initiating contact and hate to send a message that just says "Hi" or "Good evening/good morning." I think there needs to be more in a first contact message. I am just uncomfortable doing that initially. I have done it but not often.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
I Saw The Light - Finally
Posted:May 7, 2016 11:40 am
Last Updated:May 28, 2016 1:50 pm

I met someone from this site about 5 months ago around Thanksgiving time. We had been chatting for about a month before deciding to meet. He is married but of course said that they both do their own thing but don't "throw it in each other's faces" and "stay out of each others way". Like sort of roommates with no sex involved (yeah, right). They are upside down in their mortgage, have two in college etc etc etc. He was a deputy sheriff in my county for about two years; was terminated (didn't say why) and I never asked. He now is a private investigator for insurance fraud and works on "stake outs" involving auto body shops. He travels a lot with his job and works under cover.

We only had a sexual relationship during the day; he would bring lunch over and we would spend about 2 hours together. I am not sure why I allowed this to go on for the time that it did and just this week I let him know it was done and over. I really looked at the factors and saw that I was simply a good "fuck" for him once a week or so. The signs are all there and as I really thought it through I realized how foolish I have been. Here is the list of what I allowed:

1) He showed me his license to carry a loaded weapon and flashed it quickly so I couldn't see his last name. This was on our first meet months ago.
2) He would e-mail me occasionally the day before our scheduled "meets" to cancel and ask if we could re-schedule for another time. No reason given.
3) When he would call me on my cell, the display always said "no caller ID" and if I missed the call he would never leave a message. So I never had access to his phone number number. Gee, I wonder if wifey examined the phone bills?
4) We were discussing drivers licenses one day and I said I hated my picture. He asked to see it and I showed him. When I asked to see his, he took it out of his wallet but covered his address with his thumb. He thought I didn't notice. He told me he lives about 10 miles from me but his profile here on Heated Affairs says he lives in my same city. He explained that on our first meet. Using the "privacy" risk as his excuse for saying he lives in my city. Said there are too many crazy freaks on this site and he needed to protect his .....

Anyway, the sex was always good but I have had better. He always said that I was perfect for him and I suppose it was because I always dressed in different lingerie outfits when we had plans during the day. I either answered the door that way or he came in the unlocked front door and found me waiting for him in the bedroom, candles lit, music softly playing and dressed ready for him.

So I let him know we will not be seeing each other again. I told him I wanted a man that is single, can be seen with me in public, can show me his license and NOT cover up the address and most of all can stay the night with me so we can eat breakfast together and spend quality time more than just 2 hours. And I hoped he would be happy for me that I want what I deserve in a man. His TIME.

Hopefully I can find such a man..i am on another "vanilla" site and have been chatting with a couple of real nice guys that just might give me what I deserve. Only time will tell on that one. I can get sex here anytime with a simple phone call or text message..but I want also to be treated like a human being. Like my BFF always tells me to remember "no one can take advantage of you without your permission." And she is 100% correct - I allowed this and blame no one but myself. I guess I just needed sexual attention but in all the wrong ways....I am so glad I never developed feelings for this man. Just pure lust.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
Profile Photos With Others in Them
Posted:Apr 16, 2016 7:35 pm
Last Updated:Apr 17, 2016 5:11 pm

I can understand having photos posted here of couples, whether it be that they are married or simply "significant others" looking to play outside the relationship with each other's blessing. Obviously both individuals are aware of the posted photos.

What is difficult for me to grasp though, is the photos I come across where the female's face or eyes are blocked out and maybe he has his arm around her or vice versa. One guy recently contacted me on IMC and he had four photos posted on his profile all with different women that had their eyes blocked out with a black strip. I asked why he would ever consider posting these and he told me that he thought the shots of HIMSELF were good and the women were all just former girlfriends.....

I am not sure if this is his way of bragging about how many women he can get or what his motive is but I seriously doubt he thinks they are just good shots of himself. With today's technology, smart phones etc. my opinion is that he should take a few "selfies" and post them without other women in them. He states in his profile that he is single and looking to meet someone for dating and adult fun. He lives quite close to me; I told him thank you for the interest but I will pass. I suspect he may be much older than the photos now and maybe that's his way of staying young in his mind. If he had been more honest about the photos I may have considered meeting him. It makes me wonder too if it really is "legal" to post these pictures of others without their knowledge even if their eyes are covered.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923
First Meet In Person
Posted:Apr 12, 2016 9:27 am
Last Updated:Apr 12, 2016 10:48 am

When you have become acquainted with someone online, whether it be for any length of time, are you at all nervous on how or what you will do and say when you finally do meet him or her in person?

I actually am very comfortable when meeting someone new, and if I see him waiting when I drive up, i usually smile and wave until I get parked. Then when I get out of the car and approach him, I never shake hands. I am very comfortable greeting with a hug and a hello. Sometimes I have returned a kiss on the cheek. That usually breaks the ice. Many times I have seen and felt the relief on a man's face after doing that. I can understand how difficult it is for some people to meet blindly; after all like Forrest Gump says, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you are gonna get."

But I do try and make everyone I meet feel comfortable even when I know it won't be going anywhere due to no chemistry. I can always tell with the first 5 minutes whether or not I will be seeing this new person a second time or more. There is one that I met in person after corresponding for about 3 months. He was standing against his car, arms folded, and when I drove up (he knew what color and kind of car I drive) I waved and smiled. He broke into a huge smile, and when I got out of the car, he clutched his chest with both hands. When I hugged him, he whispered to me "you are more stunning in person that I ever imagined." LOLOL We still make time to see each other when our schedules permit. We would like more from our relationship but there are barriers; so we make each moment count when we do find that special time.

{=} {=} KCClaire0923

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