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Guns In America - The Prequel, Part 1
Posted:Apr 1, 2021 9:45 am
Last Updated:Jun 12, 2021 7:50 am

Because Heated Affairs will fuck this post enough to make it unreadable, the real entry is in the comments.

Based upon some of the questions and comments from readers of my previous entries on gun violence, I thought it may be of value to step back and examine the origin's of America's gun culture and why it's perpetuated.

Gun Culture in the USA
In order to best understand why the US has the gun culture it does, I find it helpful to explore why other countries don't. Let's go back to the founding of this country for a quick look at the two sides that fought each other. The bad guys lived under a monarchy and were professional soldiers for the largest empire on the planet, where the good guys, who kicked their asses, had a fledgling democratic government and were anything but professional soldiers. This is the first glimpse of the everyman as a hero, in this country, fighting for his very freedom. This underdog kept his musket the front door, should he be called upon his country again. What about his opponent, the Red Coat? Once he came home, and exited his , he had no further need for a musket. Not as though anyone was threatening to invade England. then, Europe was mostly stable, relative to fighting between neighboring countries. When fighting did break out, it was conducted professional armies.

Wrapping that thought, I would suggest that the length of time and circumstances in which a country gained their independence represent significant factors in their views toward guns and gun ownership. The US had to fight for its independence from another country less than 250 years ago in a war waged everyman soldiers. I'll contrast that with two other random countries. France's independence came after that of the US, but they fought a civil war to achieve it, which doesn't count. The country hadn't been under another countries rule for centuries then. Because it's been highlighted as having one of the lowest of gun violence, I'll pick on Iceland. Their actual independence took place in the th century, so not that long ago. But there wasn't any blood spilled; they essentially just informed Denmark 'you're not the boss of us anymore'. How stable the country is overall also plays a role, with gun violence inversely proportional to the of internal strife (i.e. most of Central America).

Finally, I don't think it's possible to overstate the importance of system of government on a country's views toward gun ownership. Until WWI, every country in Europe was run a monarch, mostly all from the same German family (hence the stability). And monarchs aren't terribly fond of the general populous owning weapons that could be used to overthrow them. The same can be said for dictators. In any case, living in monarchies, Europe had been accustomed to not having guns for centuries. That makes understanding America's gun culture challenging for those who live there.

Returning to America, once freedom had been won, it was time to explore the rest of our great land. Those pioneers and explorers carried guns to hunt for food as well as defend themselves from bears and the like. They also carried for another reason that continues to echo today. There's not much law enforcement present when there isn't a state, much less a town to elect a sheriff. In other words, you were left to your own devices to defend yourself against those who may wish to do you harm, so a gun came could come in quite handy.

Guns in Popular Culture
That segues perfectly into popular culture and the theme of rugged individualism that's echoed for a couple of centuries now. In American pop culture, when someone is murdered or grievously wronged, the hero that brings justice to the bad guy(s) is rarely law enforcement, or at least not typical law enforcement. In many cases, American pop culture portrays law enforcement as incapable, lacking latitude to enforce the law, or even corrupt. Another set of random examples. John Rambo had to defend himself from corrupt law enforcement in the first movie, then, still shunned the establishment, goes back to Vietnam and rescues POW's and returns a hero. Who doled out justice when they killed his ? John Wick, of course. The only time when law enforcement is portrayed as the hero is when one member goes rogue. Case in point - While John McClain was a cop, he was essentially a rogue cop, who had to contend not only with Hans Gruber and company trying to him, but the LAPD's incompetence. He was the true hero of Nakatomi Plaza. And that's what most American men want to see themselves as - the rugged hero who kicks ass. And kicking ass requires a lot of firepower! For most American wannabe's, the only elite unit they would be qualified for is Meal Team Six, but that's another story. Contrast that with how law enforcement is portrayed in other countries' pop culture, where they're shown as professional, capable, and bring the bad guy to justice, through hard work and intellect. At most, rules are bent, but never thrown out the window.

If anyone gives a shit, there's a Part 2 that delves into the mind of a responsible gun owner and why they own guns.
Gun Violence, Part 2
Posted:Mar 29, 2021 7:02 pm
Last Updated:Jun 12, 2021 7:51 am

Welcome bac..this one promises be quite the roller coaster ride, with a serious plot twist, so please buckle in and secure all loose items.

We'll begin Part 2 with...

The Evil Black Rifle
Yes, it's been called that by those who want ban the AR-15. The AR-15 is the civilian variant of the M-16 and is semiautomatic, with one round fired with each press of the trigger, versus the full auto. Because full auto is all but impossible to control, most M-16's are now built with semi auto and round burst fire capability. I own a number of AR-15's and find them be a blast shoot, no pun intended. They're ultimately configurable make a bullet hoser, for use in USPSA 3 Gun competition, or because they're inherently accurate, set them up for long distance accuracy. Just yesterday, I was shooting one of mine at 0 yards and grouping the bullets in area the size of a quarter. What makes the AR so much fun is also what makes it so effective for inflicting mass casualties. Inside a certain distance from your target, you can point a rifle instead of having aim it, there are magazines available with capacities up 60 rounds, and each round delivers times more muzzle energy than one from a 9mm pistol (assuming standard 556 NATO ammunition). Worth noting is that because it's a design, not a brand or trade name, there is no such thing as an 'AR- style rifle'; it's either an AR-15 or not in the same way an engine is either a V8 or not. Something to help you be a bit smarter than the talking heads on the news.
It might surprise you to learn the AR-15 has been available to civilians since the 1960's. However, it was largely overlooked by enthusiasts for its first thirty on the market. It wasn't a good hunting gun and a rifle for personal defense was ludicrous. That remained the case until 1994, when its popularity skyrocketed. What took place to cause such a shift? Quite simple actually; the AR-15, along with the AK-47, were banned. Note: skipping detail on the AK platform because it enjoys a fraction of the AR's popularity.

The crime bill / assault weapons ban of 1994 was partially geared toward taking military style rifles off the market and prohibited rifles containing more than a few key traits from being manufactured or imported. It also prohibited the manufacture or import of magazines with a capacity greater than rounds. Rifle manufacturers got around the ban by removing the traits of lesser importance (i.e. bayonet lug and flash hider) and continued production, shipping guns with round magazines. The author of the crime bill screamed that manufacturers were gaming the system. The manufacturers responded that they were complying with the law and that they had staff keep employed. The AR- suddenly received a great deal of attention and demand. Nothing makes people want something more than when the government says they can't have it. I was friends with a guy who owned a gun shop at the time, who told me there were tons of people coming in, many first time gun owners, to the last pre-ban AR's and even the post-ban versions, for that exact reason.

It should be no surprise the bill didn't accomplish anything except drive up prices for pre-ban equipment, and had zero effect on crimes committed with guns. Because anything made prior to the 1994 ratification could still be owned and sold, you could still get capacity mags (although they became $70 instead of 15$) and watered down AR's were just as capable as pre-ban versions. Not to mention manufacturers went bonkers building as much inventory as possible before the ban went into effect. Word was that Glock was using their entire allocation of import dollars to send container after container of high capacity magazines, in order to get as many as possible in the deadline.

The crime bill had a provision to sunset after , unless it was renewed, which it wasn't. By 2004, there was a great deal of pent up demand for the rifle that everyone suddenly wanted and production ramped up accordingly. When I bought my first AR during the time of the crime bill, there were or four manufacturers who offered them; now that number is closer forty, if not higher. There's a whole cottage industry around parts build your own AR-15, which is I did on the ones I currently own. That also means tens of thousands of jobs now rely on the AR-. At this point, it's worth returning the Jones mass shooting database, either confirm or refute timing of AR-'s rise in popularity. Indeed, despite being available for decades, the first mass shooting where the weapon was an AR didn't occur until 2006.

It's about now you should be asking yourself what idiot wrote the bill that made the AR-15 so popular. He's the same idiot calling ban them now, then Senator now President Joe Biden. That's right, Joe Biden is responsible for the AR-15's popularity. Show of hands; who didn't see that one coming? Regardless, he's arguably the last person on earth suited formulate a plan to gun violence.

Clearly a ban on new production wouldn't work any better than it did the last time, particularly when a massive supply of existing guns exists, but what if it was taken a step further? What if it suddenly became illegal to possess such rifles? The term 'complete failure' comes to mind. First, it would be contested in court, winding up in front of the Supreme Court (with a conservative majority), who would strike it down for violating the Second Amendment. If you remember bump stocks from the Vegas Strip shooting, you may be alarmed to learn a court recently overturned the ban on those. But what if it was upheld? Such a law would be completely unenforceable for a few reasons. First, those you must rely on to enforce the law oppose such a ban too. In response to the potential assault weapons ban in Virginia, dozens of chief law enforcement officers declared they wouldn't enforce it. There's no reason to believe a nationwide ban wouldn't receive the same widespread support. Second, no one in their right mind will turn in their guns. Would you blindly hand over something you invested so much and time into? As a benchmark, I'm probably about average for most law abiding AR owners and I've got just shy of $k invested. I predict there will be an amazing rash of boating accidents, where everyone's guns fell overboard, in a thousand feet of water. Tragic. Or they'd flat not comply (or worse). Third, there would still be the DIY crowd making 80% guns (long topic on itself, but feel free to read up on your own) and replenishing the supply.

It all reminds of a conversation I had with a Dutch colleague, while driving through a sketchy area of Rotterdam. He indicated there were a lot of shootings in that area. I pointed out that guns were all but impossible get not only in the Netherlands, but throughout Europe. He responded, 'yeah, but criminals will always get their hands on guns.'

It all reminds of a conversation I had with a Dutch colleague, while driving through a sketchy area of Rotterdam. He indicated there were a lot of shootings in that area. I pointed out that guns were all but impossible get not only in the Netherlands, throughout Europe. He responded, 'yeah, but criminals will always get their hands on guns.'

Before I wrap up on the evil black rifle, I'd like address a few other challenges gun owners have gotten relative owning AR-15's. First is the ever popular 'why do you need such a thing?' The answer is I don't need it, but as a law abiding citizen, I'm allowed . Why do you need an $8 cup of coffee in the morning instead of a much lower performance version? My second favorite is 'civilians shouldn't have weapons of war'. Newsflash, 75% of guns on the market began as weapons of war. That Colt 45 that everyone loves was designed be used as by soldiers as their sidearm, when going war. Finally, there's the ever popular 'that gun was designed kill'. Again, that applies 95% of the guns out there, either through use in defending your family or humanely hunt an animal. No, we won't venture down that rabbit hole.

So, should the AR-15 (and other military style rifles) really be banned? I get it - mass shootings are ugly, traumatic, and more frequently involve and are carried out with military style rifles. However much of a shock the system, the fact is they're statistically insignificant and banning them is nothing greater than a knee jerk reaction. For additional context, there were 60% more murders in Chicago (where you can't legally buy a gun) last year than mass shooting victims in the past DECADE. Not mention FBI statistics say that 70% of homicides involving firearms are carried out with handguns, not military style rifles or rifles period. Banning AR-15's / AK-47 rifles based upon 0.6% of all shootings will make the left all feel good about themselves and tell everyone how they've made America a safer place. Except for the reasons above, mass shooters will keep on using the rifles.

Speaking of Chicago and shooting related deaths, Kina Collins of the Illinois Council Against Handgun Violence was recently interviewed by NPR. She took issue with the President's laser focus on mass shootings and an assault weapons ban. "That's not what we're dealing with in communities that deal with everyday gun violence," she said. "We're dealing with hand guns. We're dealing with straw purchases, we're dealing with illegal guns floating across the borders into states. That's what we're dealing with."

So what can be done to decrease the number of firearm related deaths? First, I think rather than focusing on what trigger is being pulled, attention should be focused why the trigger's being pulled in the first place. Anyone with half a brain should be able to make that distinction. Having half a brain myself, that's what I'll focus on. First, I think that more and more people live solitary lives without support structures and succumb to mental illness leaving them feel hopeless or that the world is against them. On a side note, why is it the greater a boring loser someone is, the more they're convinced the government is spying on them? But people feel less included and more disenfranchised as time goes by. However, I also think too many people have been raised to be self absorbed little snowflakes that don't understand the word 'resilience'. So many murders are to 'get back at someone' for shit that is meaningless in the grand scheme of things. Being disrespected is part of life; get over it. Your significant other dumped you for your best friend? Get over it and bang his mother, not shoot both of them, you moron. How many of us were bullied as , but the thought of killing anyone over such transgressions never crossed our minds? My dad grew up in a rural area. Almost every guy had a rifle or shotgun in their car, at school, because they all went hunting after. If you had a beef with someone, it was settled with fists after school; no one ever grabbed a gun over whatever it was.
Finally, there are those who want their fifteen minutes of fame and are willing to kill to get it. Finally finally, shitty parenting has a great deal of impact, beyond raising snow flakes. perfect examples of how decent parenting would have prevented mass shootings - Sandy Hook wouldn't have happened if the shooter's mother had half a brain and not tried connect her mentally ill through shooting. (He shot her and took the guns) The Columbine shooters were a couple of complete sociopaths that had exhibited plenty of warning signs ahead of that shooting. Where the fuck were their parents?

Make no mistake, I'm completely behind universal background checks and other reasonable measures to prevent guns from getting into the wrong hands. Universal should be emphasized here, because not all states perform their checks in the same manner. NICS is the FBI's national background check system and, from what I've been able to uncover, queries their terror watchlist on each inquiry. However, only 36 states currently use NICS, the remainder either carrying out checks at the state level or using some sort of hybrid model. As someone pointed out, the Boulder shooter was on an FBI terror watchlist, yet still received approval to purchase his firearm. Colorado isn't one of the 36, instead using their own homegrown system. Had CO been a NICS state, the approval likely would have been denied, preventing another mass shooting. Again, universal background checks are a good thing, are effective, and that's a no brainer.

But other actions have to be taken to decrease gun violence or we never address the root cause. Banning weapons, aside from it not working, sends the message 'we've given up on our society'. We need to begin taking better care of each other or things will only get worse; gun violence will be the least of our concerns.

Random comment that didn't have a home, but worth including:
You can't legally make your AR a fully automatic weapon without a full background check, waiting close to a year, and spending $30 You can make it full auto illegally in an afternoon without much effort. There are devices on the market that simulate full auto, such as binary triggers, that fire a round not only when you pull the trigger, but also when you release it. And let's not forget the bump stock that became famous after the Las Vegas Strip massacre. Personally, I have an issue with these workarounds; no one's fooling anyone with them. However, at what point do you draw the line? That's a question I continue to ask myself.
Addressing Gun Violence, Yeah I'm Going There
Posted:Mar 28, 2021 7:40 pm
Last Updated:Jun 12, 2021 7:51 am

Stupid Fucking Heated Affairs and its random word and number deletions. I'd say the algorithm was created by morons, but that wouldn't be fair... morons.

Actual entry in the comments.

Having plenty of time on my hands, along with recent events, has almost guaranteed me eventually wading into this topic. As a gun owner / enthusiast, a closet liberal, and non-extremist, I think I'm able to speak intelligently about firearms without venturing toward the fringe. This entry will consist of both my own observations and beliefs as well as non-cherry picked statistics. First, let me make it clear I'm appalled by the level of gun violence in the US. There are too many lives being taken as a result of bad actors and regardless of how the reader may interpret the following, I don't take any of it lightly. I'll admit, up front, that I think a ban of any kind would be fruitless and I'll explain why. Regardless, we have to view the subject dispassionately if we are to draw any meaningful conclusions.

Because there's a lot to unpack, I'm breaking the topic into parts. In this Part 1, we'll set the stage with some statistics and address some fallacies. Part 2 will talk about the evil black rifle, then finish big with how address gun violence.

Mass Homicides
We'll start with the stats on mass homicides (I may use mass shootings interchangeably, because it's easier type), which is defined as an event involving a firearm that results in four or more deaths. These events are the ones that grab the headlines and bring the most outrage. Mother Jones maintains an excellent database of these events, that includes a lot of detail on the shooter, weapon used, etc. Links that and the FBI database I'll refer will be at the end. Also, I've stopped with 2019, because with everyone under lockdown in 2020, there weren't really opportunities for mass anything.
The data says there have been 2 mass shootings since 1982, resulting in in a total of 918 deaths. If we break the data into time periods, an alarming trend emerges. Between 2000 and 2009, there were 171 mass shooting deaths, versus 482 the following decade. The number of mass shootings more than doubled as well. Because Mother Jones' database lists the firearms used in each event, we can determine how many deaths were the result of the shooter using an AR-15 / A military style rifle. Assuming any unspecified semiautomatic rifle to be an AR-15 or AK, that number for 20-2019 is 254, or half of the the deaths from mass shootings. The decade prior saw 5 mass shootings, using these weapons, with a death toll of 33, and 2 in the 80's, with a total death toll of 15. This is reflected in average number of deaths per event, which peaked in 2017 at almost 20, although it's been in the single digits since 2018. Clearly, the AR-15, along with the AK platform, represents a serious threat, with respect to mass shootings. I'll dig into the AR-15 in the second part because there's a lot about this gun I'm sure most aren't aware of.

Overall Firearm Related Homicides
Back to the stats. Before we jump to any conclusions, based on the mass homicides, let's put some context around them. According to FBI statistics, the total number of firearm related murders, from 20 through 2019, was 78,162. That's a pretty astonishing number, which we'll dig into a bit later, but the positive thing is it's been trending downward since 2017. If we compare mass homicides with total homicides, using firearms from 20 through 2019, the former represents roughly 0.6% of the total deaths noted above. Not even one percent of total firearm murders. Again, please don't take my comments as being dismissive, but the fact is that, while mass shootings get all the headlines, they're statistically a footnote in the bigger picture. Quite frankly, it would be dumb to base legislation on something of this magnitude, or lack thereof.
Digging into the FBI numbers a bit more, another story begins to emerge. The FBI statistics break down homicides by weapon. I'm happy to report strangulations are trending seriously downward, whereas murder using explosives is showing growth, although not quite, um, explosive growth. Firearms numbers are further broken down by type: handguns, rifles, shotguns, etc. There's also a category of 'Firearms, type not stated', which I find problematic, considering it's over a quarter of the total. Looking at unmanipulated numbers, in 2019, handguns represented 62% of the ,258 firearms related homicides, but were trending downward from 68% in 2013. Rifles were only 4%. Back the not specified bucket, I think it would be cherry picking not divvy that up a bit (although the Daily Caller had no issue doing so), knowing how much AR-15's have proliferated recently. I went with 20% for rifles, which caused them jump % of firearm homicides in 2019, or 1,020 fatalities. Taking supposition a step further, we'll err on the high side and say military style rifles account for 60% of that. Wrapping a bow on the stats, military style rifles only accounted for 6% of firearms related homicides in 2019. This is the first time when you ask yourself what impact banning such rifles would have on overall gun violence.

Moving on fallacies, there are I'd like cover. First is the assertion that it's easier get a gun now than ever and that guns are flooding the streets. This is complete horseshit. First, all fifty states now mandate some sort of background check (either with the state or the federal NICS system) purchase a handgun, regardless of where it's bought. That hasn't always been the case, with some states only recently enacting the requirement. As far as guns flooding the streets, I've heard those same words since the 90's; the same whistle over and over. Actually, since the beginning of last year, gun sales have been at record highs, driven by the pandemic, then the civil unrest, followed by a Democrat being elected president. I still don't see any on the streets, causing flooding. This does concern because of how many gun buyers during this period are first time buyers, who haven't had proper training available them, because of the pandemic. The impact from either accidental or intentional discharge of guns will increase in the near term; you can count on that.

That brings us the so-called gun show loophole. Essentially, this is an instance where one party buys a gun privately from another individual, without a background check It's supposedly rampant at gun shows, but that's horseshit as well. If you're selling guns at your table, you have be have an Federal Firearms License aka FFL or you're going jail and a gun show is a pretty public forum engage in such activities. Also, see previous explanation about required background checks. Can you prevent people from taking possession of a firearm without a background check? Of course not. A perfect example is a 38 Special I took possession of from my father, recently. It was his father's gun. Did my father have a background check when he inherited it? No. Did I? No. (To the ATF, if you're reading this - before you swoop down and kill my , I've undergone 7 fucking FBI background checks in the past 18 months, so you can fuck right the hell off.)

Stay tuned for Part 2
It Was More of a Slaughter
Posted:Mar 6, 2021 12:31 pm
Last Updated:Mar 21, 2021 1:13 pm

For those riveted their seats on the imminent bl00d bath I mentioned in my previous entries, the day was Tuesday. As expected, marketing was all but wiped out, but were a ton of others got as well. The carnage was even greater than I expected and impacted engineering, finance, and a few others. I think the was around 20. Most were what I'd consider solid talent.

Marketing was wiped, save one individual, has an engineering degree. We were replaced by engineering managers and the guy ran the test lab. Now, the sum total of marketing experience within the entire team is a whopping 2 years and 3 months.

I've seen some of the new org and who's in various roles - it's downright nonsensical. The company's been on a path to failure for some time, but they clearly want to reach the destination NOW.

The one who still pisses me off is a product manager who was previously confirmed to be safe by management. Yet, he got whacked too.

Until Tuesday, I considered the senior leadership where I work (ed) to be inept, unprofessional, and incompetent. However, after pulling that move, they've crossed over into unethical slime balls.
Posted:Mar 1, 2021 4:54 pm
Last Updated:Mar 7, 2021 4:48 pm

Well, it's been confirmed by someone who knows for certain that among those whose whacking is imminent, along with most of the rest of marketing. Apparently, they're not even pretending the marketing roles are being eliminated.

The best part is who will be replacing us. My portfolio will be managed by the former head of our test lab. Another aware of will be replaced by the European engineering manager. Neither have any marketing background, whatsoever. experience.

As noted, the head of the business unit has fuck all idea what marketing does. So, he figures he can throw anyone in the role. Uh, us marketing types do have a rather specialized skill set, Sparky.

Again, I've grown my business % year on year, so performance isn't the issue.

While I would prefer to do it on my own terms, it'll be a relief to get myself clear of the massive shit show. I could feel my skills atrophy, the longer I was there.
However, I'll miss a of my colleagues, with whom I've forged strong relationships. Something about shared adversity will do that to people.

Now, it's down to the when.
Posted:Feb 27, 2021 7:42 pm
Last Updated:Feb 28, 2021 2:17 pm

aka why I should have continued to work for myself.

Until now, I haven't written much, if anything, about the company I currently work for. Much of this has to do with the fear no one would believe that such a place exists. I've been there for three and a half years, and can honestly say it's the most fucked up place I've ever encountered. It lacks discipline and accountability to the point where literally nothing that happens there surprises .

During my time there:
- the company has launched two new technology platforms. The first had to be recalled and taken off the market because it didn't work, while the second had to be removed because it infringed on multiple patents owned by competitors.
- I've had to technology platforms because in the time it took to get it off the ground, the market had passed us by and no one would have wanted it.
- the company has shipped a steady stream of defective product. A certain new fighter jet has almost been grounded, due to my company putting crap.

Last, but not least, the company has conducted three reorgs in the past three years. I saved this one for last because it's what's on my mind tonight, as it's still ongoing, despite being announced in early January. The company was being broken up into three business units and the respective GM's were announced at that time. A few weeks later, a new org chart comes , this time with boxes and titles the GM's, but no names. A few weeks after that, same org chart is published, but with names in the second row of boxes, and one addition. And that's where things have remained for over three weeks. Some of my marketing colleagues have been quietly confirmed in their roles. I have not, along with my manager, a few other marketing types, and a bunch of engineers. In fact, my manager's been told there's no place for him in the new . We've all spent the past week and a half figuratively wandering the halls, wondering what the fuck's going on. With the GM of the division in which I'd work being an operations guy, not surprised marketing is being wiped . He flat doesn't know what we do. Oh, and I have it on good authority that one of my colleagues, who's been confirmed in his role, is being whacked anyway. The word blood bath has been used to describe what's coming. This is, without a doubt, the most unprofessional thing I've ever experienced.

the heading of count your blessings, the company's taking forever to pull their shit together has allowed ample time to begin my job search and activate my network. I've already had two phone interviews and expect a few more next week. It's much easier to find a job when you have one. Even if I don't get whacked next week, I will be devoting all of my efforts to finding another employer.
Also, with Monday being the first, I'll have my health insurance for another month.

Regardless of how it happens, I'll be so damned happy to leave the abortion that is my current employer.
Always Remember You're Special...
Posted:Feb 3, 2021 5:16 pm
Last Updated:Jun 12, 2021 7:51 am

...just like every other guy who's paying attention to me.

I recently had an interlude, for lack of a better term, with someone that broke new ground in a number of undesirable ways. On paper, this someone was a great fit for me (super smart, submissive, well read, hot), but distance precluded anything substantive from developing between the two of us. Still, it was nice to interact and exchange ideas. As she wandered into what something between us would look like, were the distance removed, she became quite effusive with her praise, referring to me as 'divine' and using phrases such as 'meant to be'. You get the idea. Because life's all about context, I didn't truly take any of this to heart, but it was nice to hear.

Of course, I wasn't sufficiently naïve to believe I was the only man she was chatting with, which she confirmed. She also admitted to craving attention from certain types of men, which I'd already figured out about her. Your grandmother would have called her 'boy crazy'. But surely, she wasn't sharing such intense sentiments with other men, right? There couldn't be multiple divine men out there, right? Yeah, not so much. She admitted espousing the same sentiments to some undisclosed number of additional men. Her rationale was she used those words in a different context than was typical, and telling me of course, there's a back story. Of course...there's always a back story.

I think you'll agree that a shared language is important for well, everything. Back story or not, a soldier sitting in an underground silo can't one day decide that saying 'we have authorization to launch the missiles' really means he's going into town for a pastrami on rye.

Needless to say, I severed ties after hearing that little gem. That was late last week. I've since happily moved on and reconnected with someone I should have held onto in the first place. But for some reason, I felt compelled this afternoon to revisit the communication I had with the woman who called me divine (she's right, you know). I feared I was being too harsh toward her. Nah, should have been more harsh.

In scanning her notes, I uncovered two instances where her effusive praise was wrapped in an agreement to something I never said. This woman was copy pasting the exact same material to multiple men! Let me say it again; she was sending the same snippets of messages to multiple guys. If you've kept up with my blog, you know that I've seen a lot of different 'interesting' behaviors from women. But here's something brand new for the annals of dating history.
A Contrast in Infidelity
Posted:Jan 30, 2021 5:23 pm
Last Updated:Jul 27, 2021 5:45 pm

, infidelity represents the worst sort of betrayal in a relationship. I've seen the horrible impact of infidelity, in women I've met over the years. Cheaters deserve have their asses kicked the curb, then kicked some more. Yet, recent revelations have me a bit torn on the subject and how I view those commit adultery.

A little mea culpa before I continue. I'll admit being unfaithful in my marriage. My wife's borderline personality disorder ensured that I was constantly made feel inadequate, so when a , very attractive woman found be everything my wife told I wasn't, I fell. went on for a month before my moral compass corrected my course, which point I ended . not asking for my behavior be excused; was wrong and I take full responsibility for it.

Onward... I've previously shared some information about my father being a slime ball, but didn't mention a shocking piece of information he drunkenly shared a few years ago. It seems that he'd had an affair with a family friend for about a decade. Actually, he first divulged an affair and I correctly guessed with, which shocked him. Classify it how you will, but I was sleeping with her female offspring during a portion of that time period. In any case, it took me some time to not want to his ass. I mistakenly mentioned my affair, which he attempted equivocate with his own actions. I told him was no way they were similar; I cheated on my wife whereas he cheated on my . shouldn't shock anyone that he was panicked about my finding . As for contrition, you're better off searching for some of that in the Republican party.

In the meantime, he was his usual standoffish self with my . He wasn't exactly Mr. Nurturing with either, as a . I learned not show emotion around him, or risk being ignored or even taunted. shouldn't be a shock that I was plagued with intimacy issues later in life, that prevented from having a healthy relationship, but that's another story. In any case, he dropped to low life status for , and it took a long time for me to even speak to him, without the words 'go yourself' being included. Of course, his encore performance was the selfish behavior that led fucking the lives of his entire family. Have I neglected share how he actually did my chances get back home Richmond? Oh, he thought he was having a couple of affairs with the scammers, one of whom he specifically sent $30k for an engagement ring. It should be no surprise they were using stock pictures of blondes (not all the one, because they could get away with it, him being drunk of his mind).

Fast forward just after his brain surgery, when he checked himself of the rehab hospital because the food wasn't his liking, have return the hospital. I was on a well-deserved tirade about his selfishness my , which seemed trigger her own flood gates open. She told me about how he'd been controlling from when they started dating in . About how he attempted to separate her from her friends. She didn't have to tell how cold he'd been over the course of so many years, because that was obvious. Apparently, he even took pride that all his coworkers hated him. His pattern of doing whatever the he wanted was a theme in their marriage. My 's a bit of a drama queen, but knowing my father, everything she said rung true. Then, she dropped her own bomb; she'd had two long-term affairs, herself. My had cheated on my father, not once but twice.

Considering my strong reaction the revelation my father had committed adultery, you'd expect the toward my . Except that's not what happened. After the shock wore off, I took emotional stock and found understanding, empathy, and a bit of pity. But the condemnation never came. She sought the love she wasn't getting home; a refuge from the hateful man she married. Ultimately, I thought 'good for you, Mom.'

Since then, things have somewhat normalized and I avoid my father, when possible. Not always easy when the one has get him appointments and continue put the pieces back together on his finances. Neither party knows of the other's affairs, that aware of, and I plan to keep it that way. When I do spend time with him, I do my best to put all the shit in a box, and pretend it doesn't exist. He should consider himself lucky are neither cliffs nor apex predators in Kansas. God, this place sucks in new ways, every . This may sound like a piece on my father, and it may very well be. But it's all true and him anyway.

Now, definitely get off my lawn.
A Night With His Toy
Posted:Jan 24, 2021 2:56 pm
Last Updated:Oct 6, 2021 7:44 am

My Turkish fwb has been a topic of previous posts, but there was so much garbage around what I ultimately determined was simply her being a and attempting manipulate into a relationship. The aforementioned garbage directed focus from the important pieces of the pie, which are that I was only the second man she'd ever been with, had never experienced an orgasm before, and I directed her journey from novice in the bedroom to my perfect living sex toy. What follows is a 'best of' compilation pulled from our encounters. The entire thing is factual, just not factual from a single session. It's also abbreviated; our encounters were never this brief.

If I'm feeling ambitious this week, I may finish the narrative on her progression.

Per his instructions, she arrived and rang the doorbell at exactly eight in the evening. Looking through the side glass of the door, he could see her standing in her tie closure spring coat, with her conservative knee length skirt and flats; she exuded confidence. To anyone who passed by, she looked all the part of the accomplished university professor she was, the epitome of prim and proper. Well, a very attractive university professor. At just under five feet tall, and weighing ninety pounds on an off day, she was petite in every way. Most of her friends knew her for her keen intellect, endless optimism, and her joie de vivre. Only he knew of her other side; the side he created. He opened the door and she glided past him, not stopping until reaching the great room. Catching up to her, he helped her with her coat and was pleased with her choice of attire underneath, which was a flowered, yet completely transparent top, her pert little breasts unspoiled by a bra. She knew he loved such surprises and did her best to please him, while they were together. That was her job, as his dirty slut, his property, and she took that role very seriously.

As he admired her form beneath the gauzy material, he took note that the nipples atop her pert breasts already resembled little pebbles, in anticipation of what was to come. He had a few twists to throw her way, tonight. Occasionally, she would require being reminded of her place. In such instances, she would not make it past the grand foyer before being shoved her to her knees and made to worship his coc When she misbehaved, he would order her finish him off, right there, then turn her around and push her back out the door. But not tonight; he had other plans for his toy.

As always, he offered her a glass of wine, knowing full well her Muslim beliefs would prevent her from accepting. It always struck him that she refused to imbibe, yet welcomed, no, demanded the treatment he would be subjecting her to shortly. They sat on the sofa, chatting about this and that. He watched her become more unsettled until she became the aggressor, wrapping her arms around him and kissing him passionately. Her body was giving off the unmistakable message of 'take me to bed and fuck the hell out of me'.

'Not so fast', he told her, 'you seem to have forgotten something. We'll take it to the bedroom.'

She was well acquainted with the most direct route to his bedroom and eagerly led the way. She stopped in the large, open area of his bedroom, and stood there, looking at him intently. She knew what was expected of her, but being manhandled by him turned her on more than if she'd done it of her own voliction. A few seconds later, she got her wish, as he roughly shoved her to her knees.

'You know you need to demonstrate your worthiness as my and possession, before I touch you. Now get to it.'

He barely got the words out before her hands were on his zipper, extracting his hardening coc She was on fire tonight and dispensed with the tease, instead devouring him to the root.

'You've become such a good little cocksucker. Perhaps I should share you with a few of my young subordinates, so you can show off your skills.'

She knew he was creating a mood and understood such an act was a bridge too far for her, for now. That didn't prevent her from gushing a little over the thought of being used. And she really was proud of how well she'd learned to service a man, since he took ownership of her.

Her eyes were glazed over with pure lust as she worked his now rock hard manhood with her lips, tongue, and hands. He could see she was in her own world of desire and had to her back reality, before she brought him the point of no return. She had become such a cum slut, that he barely recognized the naïve woman she'd been a few months ago.

He grabbed her arm, yanked her her feet, then roughly shoved her, face down, on the bed. Moving forward until he trapped her with it own body, he snarled, 'God, you're such a come over here just have my cock in you. And you won't be happy unless you leave with my hot cum somewhere inside you. Even if you didn't want it, I own you and can take whatever I wish.'

With that, he flipped up her skirt and shoved his cock inside her. someone observing the scene, it would genuinely appear as though she was being taken against her will, particularly the way he had force himself inside her. The truth was that this woman was petite in more than just stature and was always a tight fit. Penetration took a bit of effort, even when she was soaked, as she was now.

Once inside, he began to slam himself into her, fucking her hard and fast, making sure to hold the angle he knew ravaged her sensitive g-spot. She howled with pleasure as he took her. It turned her on so much when her owner took what he wanted, her helpless to resist. She could only let herself be in this position with a man she trusted completely, which she did with the man now inside her.

He grabbed her hair and yanked her head up so he could speak right into her ear.

'Everyone else sees you as a respected university professor, but only I know what a slut you are. A dirty little plaything, who lives to be used like a dirty , owned like a piece of livestoc I own and use as I want, then toss you out on your ass. You're nothing but a fuck toy.'

He kept hammering her, alternating between spanking her ass, pulling her hair, shoving her face into the bed, and twisting her arm around her back as he degraded her. Each move was more extreme than the one before it and he knew he was causing her pain. This pleased him, not because he was a sadist, but because he knew pain, and lots of it, heightened her pleasure. He derived pleasure from taking his lover places she'd never been before, pushing her limits. Once again, he thought how reckless he was neglecting to establish a safe word, but such a precaution always proved unnecessary. No matter how brutal he was with her, she always wanted more.

'What are you?'

'I'm your ...all of my wholes belong to you.'

'And when can I use them?'

'Whenever you want! I belong to you!'

She screamed nonstop as he pounded her and would orgasm every time he told her what a she was. After he felt she'd been properly fucked in that position, he waited until he felt her building to another orgasm, then pulled out and told her to get undressed.

She was frustrated and completely on fire, but she didn't dare complain. She knew he wasn't done using her. But she needed to cum, just the

'Lie on your back, like a good slut. You know...your natural position in a bed.'

She complied.

'I think it's time for you to demonstrate what I've taught you about your body', he said as he sat down in a large leather chair in the corner. 'Show me that you know how to make yourself orgasm. Give your owner a bit of a show, like a good .'

And like a good little fuck toy, she began rubbing her fingers around the lips of her battered pussy. She maintained intense eye contact with her lover as the pleasure began to wash over her. As much as she wanted to give him a proper spectacle, she needed a release. With that, her opening act ended and she dove fingers deep inside her sex, working her g-spot vigorously until her hips spasmed in climax.

After her body relaxed, she had a contented expression on her face and beckoned him the bed. Once he climbed in, she acted as a content kitten and snuggled up her owner. He held her and delivered kindness, a little laughter, and tenderness, yet hadn't yet heard the word aftercare.

As they chatted, he saw she had something on her mind and looked at her with an expression that told her to just tell him. In a barely audible and timid voice, she asked 'will my butt tonight?' He'd introduced her to anal sex a few encounters ago and she found she loved it better than vaginal intercourse.

'You want me to fuck your ass?'

She nodded.

'If you want me to fuck your ass, you need to ask properly and not like an innocent little . You're so far from innocent at this point...' Chuckling, he let the remainder of the sentence hang unfinished.

She looked him in the eye and said, 'Will you please fuck my ass tonight, sir?'

'Much better.'

With that, they began to passionately kiss one another, him holding her tightly, occasionally nibbling at her tiny nec Without much in the way of conscious thought or intent, he found himself inside her again, and rolled so she could ride him. This was one of his favorite positions, because he could watch her pretty face, as she rode him. It also allowed access twist her nipples and give her the pleasure pain she craved.

That reminded him of one of the presents he'd bought for her, and rolled over far enough retrieve it from the bedside table. She watched him as he brought the devices up and attached them her nipples. She breathed in quickly from the pain and thought herself, 'Fuck, they hurt...I fucking love them!'

'Thank you sir...I love them.'

With that, she began riding him in earnest. The clamps hurt so good and he would occasionally apply pressure the chain, running between them, further heighten her sensation. She howled in both pleasure and pain as her hips moved. Her already tight pussy gripped his hard cock with greater intensity as she neared her next orgasm. He knew she wouldn't last much longer and she didn't. She wailed at the top of her lungs and beat his chest with her tiny fists as the wave of pleasure ripped through her body.

He pushed her off of him and pulled her to the side of the bed, yanking her to the floor, and bending her over the bed again.

'Do you want my cock in your ass?'

She nodded and gave a little 'mmmhmm'.

'No, I want to hear it. Beg for what you want.'

'Please fuck my ass; I need feel your cock everywhere.'

While she was begging, he retrieved a bottle of lube from the nightstand, and put just a few drops on his coc She seemed like it when it hurt going in. Grabbing her hips, he guided himself into position and drove his cock home, causing her to scream.

'Is that what you wanted, slut?'

She could only wail in reply.

Once he built a bit of a rhythm, he began with the pain and degradation she loved so much. This time, it brought out a little professorial monster. Gone was the submissive, replaced by a unrepentant hedonist, completely on fire. She began to taunt him.

'Are you spanking me? I can barely feel it.'

He spanked her harder, leaving more pronounced welts on her ass with each swat.

'Surely, you can do better than that.'

He went safeties free and began wailing on her as hard as he could. More pain would require him slugging the woman. Yet, she continued to taunt him. He began to wonder what he'd created. But that was enough impudence from his possession; she needed to be taught a lesson. Rather than continuing to spank her, he grabbed her hair, pulled her head up, and wrapped his hands around her nec He'd never choked a woman before and he was a bit tentative at first. Another taunt came and he tightened his grip, never letting up his assault on her ass. He knew how her body reacted every stimulus and could feel both pleasure and panic. Perfect. After a minute of so of this, she settled down and he removed his hands from her neck and paused fucking her. With the restriction removed, she gasped for air. She wasn't sure if she liked being choked or not. Definitely something do again, make sure.

Reaching into the nightstand, he retrieved the other present he bought for her.

'Put this in your pussy...feel what it's like when both holes are stuffed.'

She complied and slipped it inside. He could feel it on the other side of the wall between. He recommenced his attack on her ass, this time, with even greater intensity. No longer was he fucking her for her. She sensed what was happening and how he was using her ass to make himself cum. She began screaming, pleading for him to use her and give her his hot cum. That was the final check in the launch sequence; neither could stop it if they wanted to. As they were barreling toward the grand finale of the evening's events, he turned the vibrating egg he'd given her to its highest setting.

That was all it took to push them over the edge with a vengeance. She let out one final scream, then began to lose control of her body. She rose up and into a position where he could wrap his arms around her, which he did. The combination of sights, sounds, and sensations drove him over the edge. He snarled one last thing to her.

'I'm fucking cumming in your ass, . Take it like the cumslut you are.'

He flooded her ass with his load just as her orgasm reached its zenith. Just as he pumped the last of his seed into her, she lost what little control of her body she had left, and went completely limp. Had his arms not already been around her, she would have dropped like a stone. Instead, he held her until she regained a bit of control of her legs, then assisted in getting her into his bed. After her eyes refocused, she looked at him in awe and told him that was the most intense orgasm she'd ever had.

'Can I come over tomorrow night and do it again?'
Posted:Jan 21, 2021 5:38 pm
Last Updated:Jan 24, 2021 2:42 pm

See Below
Love Is a Battlefield
Posted:Jan 20, 2021 4:30 pm
Last Updated:Jun 12, 2021 7:53 am

If you think about it, being a part of a loving relationship has a lot of similarities guerilla warfare. No, not between the two of you, but with the rest of the world. Enemies abound, intent on destroying the union with your partner. They're both internal and external; some may take the guise of a non-threat. Stressful jobs, illness, financial difficulties, challenges as parents, death of a parent, the hot neighbor doing her best insert herself. The list is almost endless of what can attack a relationship.

In order for that relationship survive and thrive, it's important both parties work as a two person commando team, defending from multiple enemies, coming from different directions. They need neutralize these enemies, or at least reduce their respective threats, and then get the chopper for exfil. Without both parties fighting as brave warriors, working together, and covering each other's flank, the team (relationship) will be overrun and killed.

I think we've all been in relationships where our 'brother in arms' failed to guard our flanks. Perhaps, we were the ones who failed in our duties. Then, there are the all too common relationships that neither have the drive to fight.

And what happens when your teammate gets wounded and can no longer fight? I'd argue that's an even greater test of character than how someone fights.

My last serious relationship was with someone who it felt as though she was setting off flairs, so the enemy knew where to . And when I got hit, she seemed really sorry, but there was no way she was missing that chopper.

My ex-wife could best be characterized as shooting me in the body armor, during the battle, then lying about it. Not my finest hour, but I was with someone who fought as a fearless warrior. When one of us got wounded, the other would throw the other over their shoulder and make damned sure they both made the flight home. Ultimately, I shot her just after she threw me onto the chopper floor. Again, not my finest hour.

How would you characterize your most memorable relationship?
The Tale of the Tardy Tawdry Tart, Part 1
Posted:Dec 15, 2020 3:29 pm
Last Updated:Dec 16, 2020 4:44 am

Sucrose Neonates - Trust me, it gets more interesting
Posted:Dec 12, 2020 4:01 pm
Last Updated:Dec 12, 2020 9:54 pm

Some recent observations about those who require compensation for their time. Post is in first comment.

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