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Labels, Fables, and the Floor of Stables  

BorderLinne 65M
15 posts
5/16/2021 7:32 am
Labels, Fables, and the Floor of Stables

DISCLAIMER: I do not pretend to be an<b> authority </font></b>on any of this, nor do I imply that I have a clue as to how anyone else thinks or feels. These are simply my thoughts…nothing more.

So, here we are. Playing in a world of smoke and mirrors replete with labels. We like labels, don’t we? They allow us to place everyone in little buckets that need no further discussion, right? And if there’s one thing that we like better than the little buckets, it’s the ability not to have to talk…at least not in complete sentences, right?

“what u in2?”
“u top or bottom?”
“u bi r stght8?”

Don’t you just love it?

The problem that I see with all of that is that it’s HS. What is HS, you say? Well, it’s the thing that you find on the floor of stables. If I can borrow a phrase from a man who’s becoming a good friend here, “...don’t make me spell it .” A blog of the blog of the blogs of the wonder blogs

I’ll approach this first from the basics.

I see two distinct categories when it comes to the labels that we use, they are Emotional/Psychological Orientation vs. Sexual Activities/Practices. I see us confusing the two on a regular basis.

Gay vs. Straight

These two labels refer to an emotional/psychological orientation and, in my view, don’t really have a proper place on a site like this one (Heated Affairs). We shouldn't even be using them here. This site is not designed to find a long-term, committed/exclusive, romantic relationship; there are literally countless sites for that.

To the contrary, this site is supposed to target sexual activities. These can be better defined with the “sexuals”,, as I them: Hetero, Homo, Bi, and A. That’s right, there’s a fourth “sexual”…Asexual. The Asexual is someone who is not interested in sex of any kind or is otherwise living a celibate lifestyle. That person wouldn’t be here, so we’ll leave him alone.

Totally confused?

When I’m playing with a man, I’m participating in homosexual activities. When I’m fucking a gal, I’m being heterosexual. When I’m in a three-way with both…or simply because I seek to (or do) participate in sex with men as well as women…that makes me a bisexual person. The "sexuals" define what I do or what wanting to do...not whom I am.

None of that makes Gay or Straight. And being Gay or Straight doesn't default to play one way or the other.



I personally remain Straight in terms of my emotional orientation. I am not emotionally, psychologically, or romantically interested in men on any level. However, I do dearly love to play with their dicks…so there! And, if it's really cute, soft, fluffy and smooth...their asses!

Likewise, a Gay man can just as easily be heterosexual. Don’t believe me? Ask any Gay man who was in a marriage for years before leaving it to fulfill their true orientation. He can also be bisexual or homosexual. I personally know more than a few. I also know more than one Gay man who truly enjoys being bisexual with a couple. Some don't, but some do.

And while on the subject of Gay, let dispel the notion that many Straight men have. Just because a man is Gay does not mean that he is a predator who is constantly craving to suck or fuck you. Gay men can be just as discrete as any straight man. Don't know the difference between discreet and discrete? Google is awaiting your inquiry.

If a Gay guy fucks a gal, that doesn't make him Straight. If I suck his dick, that doesn't make me Gay.

I personally don't mind what you ; Gay, Straight, Hetero, Homo, or Bi. What's important to is that you make no assumptions of what I do or who I am. That is the way that I will approach you.

All of the “sexuals” can change/evolve from one period of time to another. But that is not what I find to be important. We all can agree or disagree with all of my ramblings about the titles. We all can continue to use all of the little buckets that we are so fond of. And, I suppose on some level it might even make our attempts to seek and find a bit easier.

The main point for me is that we all should be weary of assuming. Each and every one of us is unique. No two of us are precisely alike. We all have nuances and flavors to our personalities, dreams, desires…that are worth exploring.

Bottom line (at least for me):

Take the time to inquire. Observe what you are seeing, hearing, being given access to. It is always remarkable and worth knowing. I know of no one who has ever said it better than Mia Angelo:

I note the obvious differences
in the human family.
Some of us are serious,
some thrive on comedy.

Some declare their lives are lived
as true profundity,
and others claim they really live
the real reality.

The variety of our skin tones
can confuse, bemuse, delight,
brown and pink and beige and purple,
tan and blue and white.

I've sailed upon the seas
and stopped in every land,
I've seen the wonders of the world
not yet one common man.

I know thousand women
called Jane and Mary Jane,
but I've not seen any two
who really were the same.

Mirror twins are different
although their features jibe,
and lovers think quite different thoughts
while lying side by side.

We love and lose in China,
we weep on England's moors,
and laugh and moan in Guinea,
and thrive on Spanish shores.

We seek success in Finland,
are born and die in Maine.
In ways we differ,
in major we're the same.

I note the obvious differences
between each sort and type,
but we are more alike, my friends,
than we are unalike.

We are more alike, my friends,
than we are unalike.

We are more alike, my friends,
than we are unalike.


Mia Angelo


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