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Well, other than the obvious nowdays without masks or gloves? I don't know, I think gently at first it's almost like a dance, gently in an inquiring manner, then at some point the urgency increases, and it turns firm, perhaps even rough.
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i used to have an old account on here called L&O for Loud & Often. i posted a few times photos of my deeply bruised breast. a lot of my readers freaked! but one PM'd me to let me know he was into this kinda thing, too. but it's not all rough play for me. i don't require BDSM. i like it. but if the sex is bad then i need to compensate the experience to balance it out.
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