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| Blogs > 80sbaby71 > Life in the Nursery~ |
Useless
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Useless You know...for those who don't KNOW me...I have spent my whole life being told I was useless. I was trash. I didn't deserve to even be alive. MY WHOLE LIFE. Then in 2008 changes came...I was separating from my husband, living on my own for the first time in my life....scared to death. But...I made new friends. And found love through them...was told that I wasn't USELESS, TRASH, and I was loved. I am a work in progress. I don't text people (other than family) without "reason". I don't text guys...I can't...I don't have it in me... Why? Because I am scared still. A scared little girl. I sit home....alone when mini me is gone. I am trying my hardest to survive. I don't tell people my life....I struggle...daily with self confidence and self esteem....and yet when things go in the right directions...I get questioned, reprimanded and whether it is meant or not....I once more feel like crap. I feel like I am once more USELESS TRASH. This is the song my mini me says fits me....She tells me that I am perfect. Perfect to her. So go watch the video if you haven't seen it... So once more...I am sorry....I try...and I fail. All I want to know is at what point in my life will people stop and take me for me. At what point am I not having to question myself, my actions, my life? F**KIN PERFECT by PINK Made a wrong turn once or twice. Dug my way out, blood and fire. Bad decisions, that's alright. Welcome to my silly life. Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood! Miss "No way,It's all good", it didn't slow me down Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated! Look, I'm still around... Pretty pretty please! Don't you ever ever feel Like you're less than, less than perfect Pretty pretty please If you ever ever feel like you're nothing you are perfect to me. You're so mean (Your so mean) When you talk (When you talk) about yourself, you were wrong Change the voices (Change the voices) in your head(In the head) Make them like you instead So complicated, look how happy you'll make it! Filled with so much hatred... such a tired game It's enough! I've done all I can think of Chased down all my demons, I've seen you do the same. Oh, pretty pretty please Don't you ever ever feel Like you're less than, less than perfect Pretty pretty please If you ever ever feel like you're nothing you are perfect to me The whole world's scared so I swallow the fear The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer So cool in line, and we try try try, But we try too hard and it's a waste of my time Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere They dont like my jeans, they don't get my hair Exchange ourselves, and we do it all the time Why do we do that? Why do I do that? Why do I do that? Yeah, oh, oh baby, pretty please! Pretty pretty please, Don't you ever ever feel Don't you ever ever feel Like you're less than, less than perfect Pretty pretty please If you ever ever feel like you're nothing you are perfect to me Yeaaahhh...! You are perfect, you're perfect! Pretty pretty please, if you ever ever feel like you're nothing You are perfect to me.   |
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Your little girl is right...
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10/29/2011 7:34 pm |
Good Enough..... right on....everyone makes mistakes...it takes a good person to admit to it.....Keep the chin up push forward... there are a lot of good and great people in the world.... I was once told there are only a dozen bad people in the world, they just move around a lot.LOL
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I'd settle for just being accepted the way I am...as me.
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Your little girl is right...
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Good Enough..... right on....everyone makes mistakes...it takes a good person to admit to it.....Keep the chin up push forward... there are a lot of good and great people in the world.... I was once told there are only a dozen bad people in the world, they just move around a lot.LOL 
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