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Old Posts  

hotdreamer1000 64M
8669 posts
1/4/2022 3:35 pm

Last Read:
1/11/2022 6:55 am

Old Posts


I am lead believe that when the new beta community replaces this one, posts older than 20 may be lost.

So first of all I thought I would want back at some of your blogs, especially those of you I haven't been reading for very long, and make sure I haven't missed anything. I don't suppose I can read much though in the time available.

But then I also thought about some of my old posts. Okay a lot of them were a load of rubbish, lol. But are some I wouldn't want never be able read again. So I thought I would go through my back catalogue and pick out a few for re-posting here.

Here's one, slightly edited, about a relationship and a scenario I alluded more than once over the years.......

I just had a great time reading some members thoughts in their blogs and advice lines.

reminded me of how I originally learned enjoy more. I grew up thinking the most important thing in was for me make sure my partner enjoyed . I liked , but for quite a while I didn't realise I was scratching the surface of what I could feel.

When I was thirty I had a fantastically passionate relationship with a . (Later referred in other posts as "The Lioness." ) When we first got together she was quite experienced and clearly loved but she confided in me that she had never actually had an orgasm. I felt like I could help with this, but I lol, had never had teach a woman how come before. But I managed figure out that she was not letting her mind get into the moment. I told her to concentrate on her feelings as I was touching her and let her mind run free/ I said was like the difference between someone touching your hand when they give you the change at the cash desk, and someone you are falling in love with touching your hand for the first time. They are the feeling on the skin, but completely different in the mind.

my surprise this worked for her almost straight away and she began come {really beautifully I thought) every time we had . I got know her<b> responses </font></b>well and could keep her just hovering on the edge of orgasm without losing the moment. That is until she started pretending be further away than she was so she could trick me into making her come. I love when a woman rubs her clit make herself come when we are fucking, but sometimes I would push her hand away make her last longer! All of this put me into a position where I could stop worrying about her orgasm and start concentrating on my own, because I knew I could trust her to find a way to get what she needed out of me for herself.

I realised that although as a man I had always been able to come during , in fact I had been a lot like her in that I wasn't letting my whole mind get freely into the moment. After that I began to let go more, and between us became fantastic. I had never realised how good could be, I think this is what people mean when they say is better with someone you are really in love with. But I think it is more that is better with someone you completely trust and understand sexually. I had several other relationships with women I really loved but not had good with. Is that another skill I need learn?


hotdreamer1000 64M
12409 posts
1/4/2022 3:38 pm

In case of glitches:

I am lead to believe that when the new beta community replaces this one, posts older than 2012 may be lost.

So first of all I thought maybe I would want to look back at some of your blogs, especially those of you I haven't been reading for very long, and make sure I haven't missed anything. I don't suppose I can read much though in the time available.

But then I also thought about some of my old posts. Okay a lot of them were a load of rubbish, lol. But there are some I wouldn't want to never be able to read again. So I thought I would go through my back catalogue and pick out a few for re-posting here.

Here's one, slightly edited, about a relationship and a scenario I have alluded to more than once over the years.......

I have just had a great time reading some members thoughts in their blogs and advice lines.

It reminded me of how I originally learned to enjoy sex more. I grew up thinking the most important thing in sex was for me to make sure my partner enjoyed it. I liked sex, but for quite a while I didn't realise I was only scratching the surface of what I could feel.

When I was thirty I had a fantastically passionate relationship with a girl. (Later referred to in other posts as "The Lioness." ) When we first got together she was quite experienced and clearly loved sex but she confided in me that she had never actually had an orgasm. I felt like I could help with this, but I lol, had never had to teach a woman how to come before. But I managed to figure out that she was not letting her mind get into the moment. I told her to concentrate on her feelings as I was touching her and let her mind run free/ I said it was like the difference between someone touching your hand when they give you the change at the cash desk, and someone you are falling in love with touching your hand for the first time. They are the same feeling on the skin, but completely different in the mind.

To my surprise this worked for her almost straight away and she began to come {really beautifully I thought) every time we had sex. I got to know her responses well and could keep her just hovering on the edge of orgasm without losing the moment. That is until she started pretending to be further away than she was so she could trick me into making her come. I love it when a woman rubs her clit to make herself come when we are fucking, but sometimes I would push her hand away to make her last longer! All of this put me into a position where I could stop worrying about her orgasm and start concentrating on my own, because I knew I could trust her to find a way to get what she needed out of me for herself.

I realised that although as a man I had always been able to come during sex, in fact I had been a lot like her in that I wasn't letting my whole mind get freely into the moment. After that I began to let go more, and sex between us became fantastic. I had never realised how good it could be, I think this is what people mean when they say sex is better with someone you are really in love with. But I think it is more that sex is better with someone you completely trust and understand sexually. I have had several other relationships with women I have really loved but not had good sex with. Is that another skill I need to learn?


smartasswoman 66F  
35813 posts
1/4/2022 9:12 pm

Hmm…clearly the two of you figured out what worked for you. All I can say is if a partner pushed my hand away when I was on the verge of making myself come, I would not be a happy camper.

As far as I can tell, all of my posts going back to 2006 are in beta. Even some that I deleted long ago on this side. Your mileage may vary. One thing I’ve realized is that things don’t seem to be the same for everyone… like the other day Andrew said he fixed accounts where the profile picture was missing. It’s somewhat concerning that their migration scripts aren’t consistently working.


agelesssexylegs 80F
1145 posts
1/4/2022 11:27 pm

Most people forget how important the mind and imagination is when making out or just making love to one another,as for old posts i think even the ones you deleted long ago still appear in the new version


jajo696 113F
4287 posts
1/5/2022 1:01 am

A relationship with a persons heart n soul only enhances the connection with the body. Many people havent evolved to that point yet.

That is true intimacy where ones thoughts are bared and the other understands your mind~


hotdreamer1000 64M
12409 posts
1/5/2022 1:41 am

    Quoting  :

Oh okay, thanks Enigma, we shall see!

Meanwhile, thanks for your comment about chemistry - that's very much what I meant.


hotdreamer1000 64M
12409 posts
1/5/2022 1:45 am

    Quoting agelesssexylegs:
    Most people forget how important the mind and imagination is when making out or just making love to one another,as for old posts i think even the ones you deleted long ago still appear in the new version
Ha ha! Even the deleted ones huh? I had a weird comment from some random mad person a couple of posts ago which I deleted, (I almost never do that ) but then I noticed yesterday it was back. How does that happen, lol??? Oh well, it's all part of the strange workings of life on Heated Affairs.

On the original subject, yes, I think many people, especially men, too often overlook forget the importance of the mind.


hotdreamer1000 64M
12409 posts
1/6/2022 2:59 am

    Quoting smartasswoman:
    Hmm…clearly the two of you figured out what worked for you. All I can say is if a partner pushed my hand away when I was on the verge of making myself come, I would not be a happy camper.

    As far as I can tell, all of my posts going back to 2006 are in beta. Even some that I deleted long ago on this side. Your mileage may vary. One thing I’ve realized is that things don’t seem to be the same for everyone… like the other day Andrew said he fixed accounts where the profile picture was missing. It’s somewhat concerning that their migration scripts aren’t consistently working.
Ha ha, well of course I would never do that if I thought there was any chance of someone being left hanging, and I hope I would have known never do that to you Smarty! I do realise it was unusual!

As to the old posts - we will have to wait and see, but as lots of things have failed to work consistently in the past perhaps there's nothing new there!


hotdreamer1000 64M
12409 posts
1/6/2022 3:00 am

    Quoting jajo696:
    A relationship with a persons heart n soul only enhances the connection with the body. Many people havent evolved to that point yet.

    That is true intimacy where ones thoughts are bared and the other understands your mind~
Yes exactly Jajo - when you can really bare your thoughts. Good to see you.


hotdreamer1000 64M
12409 posts
1/6/2022 3:10 am

    Quoting  :

Ha ha, that's exactly what I think!


hotdreamer1000 64M
12409 posts
1/6/2022 3:17 am

    Quoting  :

Hey Jules, yes, I guess you always have to let your guard down if you want the real thing.

"Those fingers brushing against the back of your hand," yup, I actually do remember that, as clearly as if it was yesterday. Your comment took me straight back there. That is exactly how it all started with the Lioness. But I don't think you can have read that - (unless you have been sneaking back in time like me. ) Maybe you just intuited it from how I described what I said to her.


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